Focus meets Grundoon and Wertperch
I have been on a
road trip for the last week. I really wanted to attend
G&W's nodermeet, but couldn't make it happen date-wise, so I asked if I could stop by early on my way through the state. They kindly said yes.
…But I digress...
First, I had to get there. To
Davis, CA. I had never been there. I had been by it, through it, over it, and around it on the way to or from other places, but never been to the actual town itself.
I got checked into my hotel. At this point, I tried to
chicken out and put off seeing them till the next day. I'm glad Miss Grundoon talked me into getting my act together and
completing the mission. Revived by a
bath, I decided I was up to meeting these
scary noder people. (They were to be my first ever live ones, after all).
I called Grundoon for directions. This was to be the first of many, many,
MANY calls:
Our conversation:
Focus: “I decided not to be a sissy and come on over tonight.”
Grundoon: “Okay. Are you on campus?”
Focus: “No. I’m in my hotel across the freeway. Can you give me
directions?”
**Disclaimer in advance defending Wert's and Grundoon's safety and privacy: No one will be able to find their house using these directions. I promise. I know, because this story is true.
Grundoon: “The
directions are
easy. Go over the bridge. You know, the freeway. You’ll come to this railroad trestle. Go under. It’ll kind of curve….I think right. Does it go right? Well, just follow it. There will be letter and number streets. You want watch for the number streets and just count to
8. At
8, you’ll
HAVE to turn right or left. Turn left. Do your
ABC’s till you get to
Sycamore. Go left. Then to Colby. Turn right. We’re the only house with furniture in the drive way. See you soon!
Click.
Well.
Now, never having met any actual noders before, I thought that
this not giving an actual address may be some kind of test. Like if I could actually find them using these
vague instructions, I would be a worthy addition to the clan. With this in mind and a stamp of determination between my brows, I set off.
Now I have to tell you about Davis streets a little bit because I was driving around these streets for quite some time.
For some reason they have given the nod to some other schools by naming streets after them. I saw
Harvard,
Purdue, and
Clemson. It made me wonder what the criteria is for the street naming process. Do these other school towns have "UC Davis" streets? Is it like an exchange street sign program? Are students involved or just signs? Do they get any
advertising revenue? What??
Also, as I was driving and searching and calling and driving and getting lost and calling and not getting the ADDRESS while calling and driving -- sorry, lost it for a minute there --
You’d think for a town built around higher education, they would count higher than 8 on their numbered streets. Well, maybe it’s okay to stop at 8 because unless you do some long division (driving-wise), "the place on 8th where you
‘have' to turn right or left (above)”, actually happens on
7th street. So you literally
can't get there from here. It doesn't exist on 8th street.
The ABCs are not fully represented either. I believe they stop at the letter "L". My theory is the founding fathers panicked and said, “Oh my god, we’ve got some numbers, we’ve got some letters, but we’ve left out the flora and fauna! Shit! Whatta we do? Whatta we do?”
So they said to hell with "M" street and started with the trees. But even this is weird. I’m driving along:
The
premature end of the alphabet after the having to complete the equivalent driving maneuver of long division to even
find 8th street prompts
yet another phone call to Grundoon, whom, I can tell by her tone, thinks I am a complete idiot by now. She tells me,
"DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE ALPHABET. WORRY ABOUT THE TREES. KEEP GOING."
By now, I really, really want to find a Borders or a Starbucks and logon to E2 and find out if this is some kind of
initiation rite...and maybe see if someone can take
pity and just sneak me their address if they know it so I can just get there. But I trudge on. Now looking at tree signs:
Cherry St.
Cherry St. (Again…what the hell)
Plum St.
Plum St.(Again..WTF..different varietals? What??)
Peach St.
(No peach Again -- guess they didn't like peaches)
Oak St.
Pine St.
Pine St.
No Sign – GOTTA BE SYCAMORE the way MY night's going!..I turn here on a wild hunch.
I finally find
Colby. I guess they got tired of trees and started in with the cheeses. I have had many phone conversations by now with Grundy due to the general weirdness of Davis streets and, ummm, how can I say this? THE DIRECTIONS. I say this with most affection and lots of grins, Miss G.
I drive up and down this street. EVERY HOUSE HAS FURNITURE IN THE DRIVEWAY OR YARD.
Except one.
I give up. I know that I am failing some super secret E2 first time initiation test to find the veteran noders meet and greet test.
I don’t care at this point.
Ring. Ring.
“Hi. It’s me.
Again. Wouldn’t this be a lot easier if you’d just give me your address?”
Grundoon: “I didn’t give it to you?
Focus: “No.”
Grundoon: “Oh.”
Laughing all around.
I was two doors down. Arrived safely.
A good time was had by all. We talked well into the night and had an extremely enjoyable evening. Thank you SO much, Grundoon and Wertperch, for opening your beautiful home and making time in your hectic moving house schedule to let me meet my very first noders.
You were wonderful.
For me, the quote of the night is when we had that whole case of wine out on the table and one of the
girls asked with complete disdain, “Are you going to drink
ALL of that wine tonight?” Then, when we all started laughing, one of them said with equal disgust, “Gawd, they’re
ALREADY drunk.”
(We weren’t, for the record.)
grundoon's editorial disclaimer
'Tis true that E Street does not go through to 8th. Jog over one, though...Other than that, the actual directions? Take Richardson back over the freeway, then it will go under a railroad trestle. It turns into E St, altho at the intersection it curves slightly right. Turn left onto 8th street, go through 4 stop lights to the end, that's Sycamore. (I did at some point ask if she was writing this down....) Turn right, Colby is three streets up, right again onto Colby. We live at insert street number here Colby. Truly. I said it. Really I did. Just goes to show ya the difference between what we say and what we hears...br>
Focus is a peach, we had a great time and kept the neighbors up laughing, and we will keep her. Covet her art.