My friends, have you opened your heart to Satan? Only when you welcome the power of Lucifer into your life can you be saved from the horrors of Heaven.
You don't want to go to Heaven, do you? To spend all eternity praising God and chillin' with good people... Brrrr! No, not for us! We want to live forever in the unholy city of Dis, torturing sinners and fornicating wantonly with vile yet luscious demonesses!
All Hail Satan, baby! All Hail Satan!
Twenty-five downvotes? Must be Christians. Damn ill-educated donkey-fuckers. Our Lord and Master Satan will destroy you all.