Why did the chicken cross the road?
Pat Buchanan
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
Dr. Seuss
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!
Ernest Hemingway
To die. In the rain.
Martin Luther King Jr.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.
Grandpa
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good
enough for us.
Aristotle
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
Karl Marx
It was a historical inevitability.
Saddam Hussein
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite
justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Ronald Reagan
What chicken?
Jerry Falwell
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the
plain truth in
front of your face?
The chicken was going to the "other side."
That's what
"they" call it
the "other side."
Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay.
And, if you eat
that
chicken, you
will become gay too.
I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this
abomination that
the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the
other side."
That
chicken should not be free to cross the road.
It's as plain and simple as
that.
Ken Starr
I intend to prove that the chicken crossed the road at the behest of the
president of the
United States of America in an effort to distract law enforcement officials
and the
American public from the criminal wrongdoing our highest
elected official
has
been trying
to cover up.
As a result, the chicken is just another pawn in the
president's ongoing and
elaborate scheme to obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law.
For
that
reason, my
staff intends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he
cooperates fully
with our investigation.
Furthermore, the chicken will not be permitted to
reach the other
side of the road until our investigation and any Congressional follow-up
investigations
have been completed. (We also are investigating whether Sid Blumenthal has
leaked
information to the Rev. Jerry Falwell, alleging the chicken to be
homosexual
in an effort to
discredit any useful testimony the bird may have to offer, or at least to
ruffle his feathers.)
Captain James T. Kirk
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Fox Mulder
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes.
How many more
chickens have to cross before you believe it?
Freud
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed
the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
Bill Gates
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross
roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your checkbook-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of
eChicken.
Einstein
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the
chicken?
Bill Clinton
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
chicken?
Could you define chicken please?
Louis Farrakhan
The road, you will see, represents the black man.
The chicken
crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.
The Bible
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken,
"Thou
shalt cross
the road."
And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
Colonel Sanders
I missed one?