The last time that I took Spanish was in 1998 so I can't claim any proficiency in the language. Even back in 1998, my biggest accomplishments in Spanish class included memorizing the words to and singing along with "A Una Cancion Para Mama" by Boyz II Men. However, my lack of retention for the language actually helps my case here.

One of the few things I remember from my days of high school Spanish is the way to determine whether to use ser or estar. My teacher gave us acronyms that I haven't been able to forget to this day. Although the guy was a bit crazy, his acronyms actually worked. Now, it is with great honor (or honour, if you prefer) that I pass them down to you. TINMOPE and CHEL.

Ser: TINMOPE

  • Time
  • Identity
  • Nationality
  • Materials
  • Occupation
  • Physical/personality traits
  • Equates nouns

Estar: CHEL

  • Current state or condition
  • Health
  • Emotions/feelings
  • Location