Biggie Size it, bizzatch!
Dave Thomas, burger man extraordinaire and your personal
savior, founded
Wendy's in 1969. He had previously made millions managing four failing
KFC restaurants for
Colonel Sanders and turning them into successes.
With the money he made from that enterprise, he was ready to live his
childhood dream of owning and operating his very own
fast food restaurant!
The first restaurant opened in 1969 at 257 East Broad
Street in
Columbus,
Ohio, right here, in the
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!
It was named "Wendy's Old Fashioned Hamburgers" after Dave's eight
year old daughter. She was not in fact named Wendy (they called her
Melinda, cuz that was her name), but that didn't stop our hero Dave! (It
was her nickname.) That original restaurant is still open today, and
it doubles as a Wendy's museum.
Wendy's was dedicated to serving higher quality hamburgers than the competition.
This wasn't very hard, as
McDonald's and
Burger King both royally
suck. Besides offering
good food, another thing that set them apart
from the competition was that they offered SQUARE burgers instead of ROUND
burgers, which even a common idiot with a degree in
hamburgerology can see
is vastly superior. Because it's square, you see. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?? (Why are they square, you ask? Because Dave's grandma told him never to cut corners. Could I make that up?! Okay, I could, but I'm not.)
Make love to me like you are Oprah Winfrey and I am a Wendy's triple!
Dave opened up a second Columbus restaurant in November of 1970, which was
the first restaurant in America to have a
Drive Thru Window. Not
many people know this, but prior to 1970 you actually had to go INSIDE the
restaurant to get your food! THE HORROR! The first franchisee-owned
store was opened by
L.S. Hartzog in
Indianapolis,
Indiana in August
of 1972. The chain continued to expand rapidly throughout the '70s,
and the
Wendy's Management Institute was opened in 1972 to help train employees
and potential franchisees. Note that even though McDonald's'
Hamburger
University started eleven years earlier, in 1961, they were OBVIOUSLY ripping
off Dave's idea because McDonald's absolutely sucks and
no good ideas can possibly have come from them. 1976 marked Wendy's
GOING INTERNATIONAL, BAYBEE as the 500th restaurant opened in
Toronto,
Ontario,
Canada.
A second 1976 milestone occurred that September, when Wendy's had its
Initial
Public Offering and became a publically traded stock on the
NASDAQ exchange.
It would later switch to the
New York Stock Exchange in 1981, where
it is still traded under the symbol "WEN". BUY STOCK NOW!
Wendy's began offering salads in 1979, proving that they are indeed trying
to kill people (slightly) more slowly than
McDonald's. It was the
first new product added to the menu since the chain's inception in 1969 and
kicked off a neato "menu diversification program" which is an incredibly
complicated way of saying that they added more food to the menu. 1983
would see the addition of the
Baked Potato.
WHERE'S THE BEEF?
Despite being the most
bling bling fast food franchise in America (have
I mentioned the SQUARE BURGERS??), Wendy's still trailed behind
McDonald's
and
Burger King in 1984. This is mostly because Americans are extremely
stupid and do not recognize quality food when they see it, but I digress.
So in 1984, Dave Thomas knew that SOMETHING HAD TO BE DONE! So,
they found their key to success--OLD FOGIES! Octagenerian
Clara Peller
became the center of a nationwide advertising campaign. She would go
to competitors restaurants and valiantly search between their hamburger buns
for the meat, which of course WAS NOT THERE! "Where's the beef?" she'd
ask. Where? YOU KNOW WHERE! At Wendy's!!!
The ad campaign was astoundingly successful, leading to a 31% increase in
sales during this period (1984-1986). Even only being around five years
old around this time, I distinctly remember seeing these commercials and
giggling hysterically at this silly old woman who couldn't find the beef.
IT'S RIGHT THERE, OLD LADY! AT WENDY'S! Stop eating crappy
burgers and GO TO WENDY'S!
Peller was fired in 1986 for BETRAYING Wendy's by appearing in a
Prego
ad. A Wendy's VP said: "Clara can find the beef only in one place, and
that is Wendy's." Okay, maybe that's taking loyalty a little too far.
REGARDLESS, I still think she should've been put to death for her
insolence.
She died in 1988 at age 86.
I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that
Finally, in 1989, Wendy's launched a new advertising campaign and gave us
what we really had been clamoring for--DAVE THOMAS ON OUR TELEVISION SET!
He began to appear in Wendy's commercials himself, advertising new
products and just generally being a nice guy. This kicked off a period
of international expansion for Wendy's, as new restaurants began to open
in
Mexico,
Indonesia,
Turkey, and many other exotic and interesting
locations!
Was Wendy's content with that? NO! Dave also blessed us with
the
Super Value Menu in 1989, offering seven great items for only 99 cents!
1990 saw the addition of the
Grilled Chicken Sandwich and 1992 added
more salads to the menu in order to provide more nutritious goodness.
President
George Bush asked Dave (who was adopted) to be the spokesperson
for his new national initiative, "Adoption Works…For Everyone" in August
1990. Even though Bush launched us into an
unneccessary war
in
Iraq and sent us plunging into a
recession, DAVE WAS ABLE TO GRACIOUSLY
LOOK PAST ALL THAT! He accepted Bush's offer and Wendy's adopted adoption
(
no pun intended) as its nationwide charitable cause. In 1992,
The
Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption was created to further that cause.
Wendy's merged with
Tim Horton's in 1995, furthering Dave's goal of
TOTAL WORLD DOMINATION great burgers (AND
DOUGHNUTS) worldwide!
May 1996 was a great time in my life, as Wendy's introduced the
Spicy Chicken
Sandwich and made me an extremely happy man. It remains my favorite
menu item. Why, you ask? Because it's the only
fast food "spicy"
chicken sandwich that's ACTUALLY SPICY. The following month, in June,
Wendy's debuted the very popular all-white meat 5-piece crispy chicken nuggets.
These are good, but they only come in servings of five! FIVE
IS NOT ENOUGH! TWENTY WOULD BE BETTER!
March 2000 sadly saw John "Jack" T. Schuessler take over as Chairman and
CEO for Dave, whose health was rapidly declining due to heart and kidney
problems he had been battling since 1996. Dave Thomas would pass away from complications due to
liver cancer on
January 8, 2002.
Fuck you! I've got burger powers!
Today, there are over 8,000
Wendy's restaurants around the world; the company
is headquartered in
Dublin,
Ohio. It is still run on the same simple
principles Dave founded Wendy's with all those many years ago: "Serve hot,
fresh hamburgers that are made to order with a choice of toppings and
treat
each customer as a special guest."
Go eat Wendy's. NOW!
http://www.wendys.com and http://www.wendyshighschoolheisman.com/hsh/about/history/bio_thom/ were helpful