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"You will be fulfilled."

--Motto of the Fulfillment Center

Hi. If you are anything like me, you have a Fulfillment Center in your town. But what exactly is a Fulfillment Center? I went into one to find out. Let us have a look.

First, we must take a minute to contemplate the very idea of fulfillment. Then we must think about why we are seeking it out in a factory.

The first thing that happens after you sign in at the Fulfillment Center is that two guys with very wet, clammy hands come over to you. They put you on a wagon and wheel you into a room that looks like a factory floor from the 1950s, complete with workers who have been so beaten into submission, so accepting of their fate, that the empty look in their eyes sends a chill up your spine. These people are already dead.

These men then proceed to strip you naked, wasting no opportunity to let their slimy hands glide and grope every part of you. Their tongues are darting in and out of their mouths. They are looking at you like you are a piece of meat and they are animals. It is GREAT. Very, very fulfilling. And in ways you probably never imagined and never will want to imagine ever again. You will be absolutely traumatized by how fulfilling this experience is. You won't be able to function in everyday life. It will be GREAT.

I remember back in 2006, at You Have No Class, I Have No Ass: A Perth Nodermeet, when a bunch of us took a newbie out back and skinned him alive, which was the tradition at the time. As we listened to him shriek while the gods stripped one layer of skin after another and then dunked him in turpentine, we felt so close to fulfillment. We just hadn't gotten there yet. Kind of like when your mother walks in on you while you are diddling to a Patrick Swayze poster.

After the men with questionable ethical values (needs to be noded) finish stripping you of your clothes, they load you into this machine. It is kind of like a car assembly plant deal. All the other people are hooked up to the same overall apparatus. Everyone is locked down, on all fours, naked in the machine, which basically just keeps you in that position while they get the eggs.

These eggs are vibrating eggs. They come in different sizes. Some are as small as a robin's egg. Others are as large as a rabbi's head. There is a pretty wide variation in egg (a) sizes and (b) shapes. These vibrating eggs are designed to go into your anus.

I'm sure this all sounds great to someone like you so far, but you have to realize that the popularity of the Fulfillment Center means that your naked thighs and arms are co-mingling with those of the person to your left, and to your right. This person might be a stranger. It might be your boss. Do you want your supervisor's elbow pressing against your thigh while a vibrating egg goes into his anus? Think about it. Keep thinking about it. Eventually, you'll get sick. You want this. You want this more than you've wanted anything in your life. You don't want to admit it, but what is going on here is exactly how you fantasized the perfect day would be. You are in for the duration. And there will be quite a duration. The eggs are on long-life batteries. And they will keep sticking one after another into your anus until your body explodes with ultimate fulfillment.

Which is, of course, GREAT.

You have found the place of your dreams. This is the place that will come to define you. It is your everything. It is fulfillment.

Be careful though, I saw this guy who had already taken 62 life-affirming eggs into his ass. He kept begging for more. Then one of them turned sideways on him. You should have seen his face. Priceless.

You may think that having a facility where sweaty men forcibly shove vibrating eggs into people's asses would be a problem in your hometown. I can't tell you that you are wrong.

I cannot understate how fulfilling it is to have strangers insert life-sffirming vibrating eggs into your anus. If you haven't tried it, you don't know what you are missing. What you are missing is fulfillment. I have six in my ass right now, affirming so much life I can't even believe it right now.

If you can get over rubbing knees and elbows with your aunt while naked and having one vibrating egg after another pushed deeply into your ass, consider checking out a Fulfillment Center. Ask for the "Ass Plasty Package." You'll be glad you did.