Last week a hungry young lady came into Market Wraps 15 minutes before I was supposed to be off the clock. She perused the menu and asked if the gyros are good.

Me: "Yes, they are."
Customer: "It says it contains lamb. Lambs are little, right?"
Me, trying to keep a straight face: "They're, um, smaller than sheep."
Customer: "See, I don't like to eat anything that's little. Cows are okay 'cause they're bigger than me. But I won't eat anything smaller than I am."
Me, biting my lip and trying not to laugh: "You're bigger than a lamb."
Customer: "Okay then. I'll take a chicken sandwich. To go."

What the hell are they feeding chickens these days?