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Dare I eat a mango

Before I moved to Puerto Rico the safest way for me to eat a mango was in the bathtub. Generally they're very juicy and no matter what I did I managed to make of mess of both me and the mango. However, there are a couple of almost safe ways to attack the fruit.

If you have the small yellow magoes from around Mayaguez:
  • Roll the mango on a flat surface that same way you would roll a lemon before extracting the juice. You've rolled enough when you can rotate the big seed inside without breaking the skin.
  • Using your teeth, rip off a piece of skin at the top of the mango
  • Place your mouth over the hole
  • Squeeze the fruit from the bottom up, as if you were squeezing toothpaste from the bottom of the tube
  • The sensation is like drinking nectar straight from heaven
If you have any of the larger varieties of mango, the operation is less hazardous. The type I prefer has the colorful name of huevos de torro, colloquially "bull's balls," probably because of its size and shape. Anyway, with any large, meaty mango:
  • Put the fruit lengthwise on the table and feel for the seed which should lay horizontally inside the skin about midway through the fruit
  • Once you've determined where the seed is, slice the mango so that the knife just passes over the top of the seed
  • Turn the mango over and repeat the process
  • With each big slice you've removed cut hatch marks through the flesh just down to the skin
  • Holding the piece flesh side up, press your thumb on the skin side underneath as if you were going to turn the piece inside out
  • Up will pop many bite-sized pieces of flesh, which you can cut out to put into a fruit salad or whatever
You can mash the pieces and add to an ice cream recipe; make a mango pie just as you would a peach pie; put in a blender with milk and a little sugar for a refresco. Mangoes are always messy, but some are messier than others.

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