I swear I think I reek of pheromones right now.
I have been restless all day.. spent most of it bickering over something stupid with some friends online and am still a little grouchy about it. Tried to get work done but just couldn't keep my mind on anything for more than ten minutes at a stretch. Deadlines are looming and I am frantic about getting everything done on time, but I just.. can't make myself do it.
I end up at a friend's house tonight, a bad idea with all the things I need to do. And especially so, because this particular house and all that I associate with it (past parties and relationships) seems to bring my hormones surging to the surface. I love to flirt, and I really can't help myself there; the best I can do is simply tone it down to a minimum.
I finally take my leave, and as I get into the car and begin driving home, all I can think of is the secret lover I've been trying not to see for the past month or so.
So here I sit, unable to work, unable to concentrate on anything... radiating pheromones like nothing else... and glad it's so late at night that I won't have to interact with people until morning. In moods like this it's impossible for me to keep my mouth shut, to resist those little flirtatious comments and gestures.
I always want what I can't have - and I want it so badly I can't think of anything else. Dammit, why now?