Shades of black and blue, with hazy flashes of grey. The night rain left a mist in the air, with a sweet taste of freshness, alongside a gust of wind. With the wind blowing, I turn back, inside once again. I place my hand on my armchair, and swing it around. It turns quickly, like how everything else has.
Blinking slowly, I stare at the screen blindly, with the silence speaking to me. I no longer think when I am
noding, I just let it flow. Emotional escape from emotional escapades. Let the mind have its say and silence it for the rest of the day. My eyelids grow weary, my eyeball dry as a bone. I close my eyes, yet cannot sleep. Taunted by the prospect of rest, I walk to my bed.
I lie there, with a drink in my hand. Medication said not to mix with alcohol. Too bad I can't read if I'm drunk. But I place it down, making a crease on the carpet on where the cup lies. I close my eyes and pray, hoping that someone else would hear me, or at least care enough to listen. I lie there, with the darkness of my eyelids and the
solitude of my mind. I sit there and whisper to myself "Things will get better...You will see..." over and over until I finally sleep.
I wake up, then go out to eat. Off to work I go. Sluggish, I work hard, only to not have anyone see it. Feeling unappreciated, I wished that tonight would be the night that I would become calm. But it was not to be. After watching
Blow starring
Johnny Depp, the night engulfed the sky. Homeward bound.
I come home, once again to the silence of a fully asleep home. I walk out into my porch, place my hand on the balcony rail. I feel goosebumps on my arm building but I don't notice, as the glare of the full moon shines down on me. I sit, crosslegged, on the asphalt lining of the deck. I take a deep breath, inhaling the life of the night mist, with the feeling of the creation of the impending dew on the leaves on the nearby trees. I'm then reminded of the beautiful sight I saw on the way to work. The way the pinkish leaves swayed with the natural rhythm of the wind. The whistling sounds of the breeze as it seeped through the small opening on the window. A tear comes to my eye, for I can never find myself in something so beautiful, so tranquil. I breathe deeply, then slowly open my eyes to the world. A small dead leaf floats in the wind. I try to catch it with my hand. To no avail. Like anything else. I try to get it, but it slips between my fingers.
I close my eyes, and pray. I place my hands together,and pray. I say a silent prayer, and breathe deeply. May peace find me tonight. If not, may peace find someone more deserving. If I die before I wake, may peace find my soul. If I wake tomorrow,I hope that its a day better than today. I hope it was more like yesterday. May god help my soul.