She's pretty much over him. He says, "We'll be friends forever no matter what." and now has not spoken to her for over a year. Just a text saying "I've moved on." She replies, "From sex or the friendship? Because sex stopped a long time ago." He doesn't reply. She sends a message: "If you are not going to speak to me, I am unfriending you on Facebook. You boast of how you spy on people and I think it's ugly." No reply, so she unfriends him.
She's pretty much over him but still remembers parts that she really enjoyed. Holding hands in the car. Hugging. Talking as they walk on the beach, longer and longer walks. She gives herself permission to use him. She makes him into a fantasy, where he returns and wants her back in his life. This will not happen, at least, she doesn't think or feel so. He is drinking and potting himself into a haze, even when the band performs. Another band member is disgusted, but is silent because he knows the band's life is limited now, with one dead. Who will die next? Two have had heart attacks. Her ex-friend has not had one yet. He's angling for a stroke actually, says that that is how his family goes. He says at 80. He's well on his way towards it if he's drinking and drugging steadily. Maybe sooner.
She enjoys the fantasy of him showing up, saying he can't stop thinking about her. She says, "I don't want to go back. You are controlling. You told me never to ask for anything. I don't want anything to do with that." In her fantasy he is forced to change and he wants to. In her fantasy he admits he's loved her all along. In her fantasy he brings her yellow roses and that is just the start.
She is looking forward and wondering what next. Meanwhile it's nice to have a fantasy.
Her fantasy is user friendly.