The Scene: Everything Chatterbox.
The Time: 1:45 PM EST, the middle of ideath's workday.
yossarian slams hoopy with a mackerel
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ideath>
Bang! Who'd i shoot?
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hoopy_frood> Ow! I'll get you for this one!
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booyaa> shoot? what?
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yossarian> That'll teach you to mess with the king of fish, knave!
yossarian checks for bullet holes
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zot-fot-piq> ow! you got me!
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ideath> nope, i shot hoopy.
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hoopy_frood>
king of fish, indeed! why, when I was king of fish, things were different around here.
hoopy_frood checks for ticks
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ideath> try again -
Bang! Who'd i shoot?
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hoopy_frood> hey! no
fair!
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yossarian> hey! no
fair! you always shoot hoopy!
yossarian punches hoopy on the arm
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yossarian> Jinx!
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booyaa> nobody ever shoots me!
hoopy_frood reels, in slow motion, and falls to a heap on the ground.
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zot-fot-piq> did you shoot me this time?
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yossarian> what's all this shooting? do I have to get out
the big fish?
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ideath> no, i shot hoopy.
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ideath>
Bang! Who'd i shoot?
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zot-fot-piq> I'll shoot you, booyaa.
hoopy_frood groans. the light! it's getting closer!
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yossarian> I have the
marlin. The marlin is good.
So is the wine.
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Saige> What's going on? is somebody shot?
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yossarian> id: take off that blindfold and drop the gun, or I'll be forced to use this marlin!
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ideath> THIS TIME, i shot zot.
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ideath> oh, come on, yoss - it's just a game.
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ideath>
Bang! Who'd i shoot?
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yossarian> I'll show you just a game! hoopster over here is talking to his grandmother.
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emil greer> was it me?
yossarian winds up with the gigantic fish.
hoopy_frood slumps over dejectedly in a pudle of his own blood.
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hoopy_frood> puddle, I mean.
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ideath> i shot yossarian.
Bang! Who'd i shoot?
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yossarian> hey! you can't talk! I
jinxed you! AND you're
dead!
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yossarian> oh, the
humanity!
Horatio, I am dead. (falls)
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yossarian> I ought never to have trusted you.
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ideath> you're right. i shot you again.
Bang! Who'd i shoot?
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DMan> what's with all the shooting? somebody been reading my nodes?
zot-fot-piq wonders if ideath is, in fact, a postal worker.
hoopy_frood thinks, i'm glad i wasn't really alive to begin with. death means nothing to me!
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ideath> now i shot DMan! anybody get it yet?
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booyaa> I said, nobody ever shoots me! this is a game?
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Pseudo_Intellectual> I know many, frequently
obscure things. Ask me about it.
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ideath>
Bang, Who'd i shoot?
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ideath> yeah, it's a game. i just couldn't figure out how to
node it.
hoopy_frood draws himself to his feet and searches for the rest of his head.
yossarian wonders if ideath is actually trying to drum up business for an online mortuary.
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DMan> geez.
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zot-fot-piq> i don't get it.
ideath realizes that last time, she shot herself.
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hoopy_frood> good.
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zot-fot-piq> it was
inevitable. they're not toys, you know.
ideath , clinging to a bit of life, whispers, Bang! Who'd I shoot?
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elmochick> hey! somebody voted down my piercings again!
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ideath> (from the deathbed) i shot ELMOCHICK!
yossarian gets a pillow and a determined look in his eye.
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elmochick> what did you shoot me for?
hoopy_frood eats ideath's brains.
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hoopy_frood> mmmm. brains.
none of this dialogue actually took place. all of it is made up. none of it should insult anyone, because it is made up and i was just trying to illustrate a game that can drive people crazy in the real world - but i think it would make people more crazy in the chatterbox. If you didn't get it, the answer is: whoever spoke first was shot. ok? This is the latest in my series of (frequently irritating) time-wasting games, which are part of everything, and now part of Everything.