September 17, 2000
Everything Editor Logs
history | prophecy

Hear, o dem bones the sounds of the gel being shaped by the users of many levels into numberless nodes. We worry that there is not enough gel for the nodes yet to come. The nate says that this is not so, we need not worry, that the gel is infinite. Still, we know the gel. The gel is precious. The gel must be handled well. There is nothing outside of the gel for it to be measured by, so we do not know if the gel is infinite. The nate, dem bones, the users are only currents in the gel. We are only currents in the gel. We know the gel. We know some shapes of nodegel are wrong. Other shapes are not wrong but the users who formed the gel no longer have care for their nodes and give it the sound/shape/flavour/scent/marker for wrong. These must be carried to the Crypt to be returned to the gel. The gel is precious. Some node shapes are very right. These should be carried to Page of Cool. There the users may learn of the right shapes for their nodes. All is well. The server has passed the point of 0s and now time begins again. The nodeflow sounds right. We now move out amongst the nodeshapes to seek out what is right and what is wrong. The gel is precious. We know the gel.

To the Crypt:

  • New user akaaka. Fearing "the packet trace of doom", she said. ???
  • W.W.J.D.I.H.C.B.R.T.S.A.C.Y.D.T? and Drop Off Bar by TaintedTex. By request.
Nodeshells have been relaxed into the gel. Further:
  • i want a cookie by Gamaliel. By request.
  • big baby jesus by h e. Nov. 13, 1999 "see also" node.
  • horses by forrest joseph. Enthusiastic but linkless yelling by a fled user.
  • BSD/Linux by blaaf. By request.
Fixed some Webster's. Title edits.

The freegel is increased in volume by:

  • NP Complete Problems by Shafik. Blank node, Nov. 13, 1999. Suggested by Wuukiee.
  • By N-Wing, ratted out by blaaf for copyright stuff. Apparently the Zondervan company takes copyright very seriously. I asked N, and he said,"Yeah, go ahead and kill them. But they /were/ there before the KJ version was up, so they aren't duplicates. And mine was done better :)"
    • Bible: NIV: Jonah
    • Bible: NIV: Jonah: Chapter 1
    • Bible: NIV: Jonah: Chapter 2
    • Bible: NIV: Jonah: Chapter 3
    • Bible: NIV: Jonah: Chapter 4
  • By AsciiC, as requested.
    • Everything Maze+
    • Slashdot effect as a weapon+
    • cool features in everything
    • everything games
    • Everything Maze++
    • wharfinger hates me :(
    • profesor's writeup on everything games

Oh, the rending of garments. The gnashing of teeth. How the beards were torn asunder with banshee like wails. The poll: describe your mousepad went down like the Titanic. Slowly but surely. All those famous noders and multitudinous writeups on this saintly subject, butchered like so many cows for Big Macs.

"How long have you wanted to do this, dannye?"

Ever since I logged on to this black hole of a web site.

"Do you think it's going to piss people off?"

I did it on a user's request in the delete request node.

"You did not. You did it because you always hated that node with a passion!"

Did not.


Well, it's done now. I can't take it back.

Nodes/writeups removed today:

  • If you were a Greek letter, which one would you be? by dwyn. User /msg'd.
    -OK, here's a policy I will try to abide by now, as in the "Node Titles With the Word Fuck in Them" policy. Anything which looks as if it's starting a NEW poll, with no point which can be possibly discerned by a reasonable adult, I'm going to remove it before it becomes the eyesore that the item above did. Thank you for your understanding.
  • I would like to make love to jessicapierce by stride. Content? "Duh."
    -User was in the catbox seemingly bragging about noding while drunk. I do not find this amusing, if this is the best user can do under the influence.
  • Who wants to send me a postcard?! by PJ_Jules w/ w/u by nine9.
    -C'mon, folks. Begging for mail? This really does make us all look bad, I fear.
  • the system is corrupted and unjust by redgirlie. User /msg'd.
    -New user complains that she heard from someone that something might have happened at one time that may or may not have been unjust on E2, but she's not sure.
  • 17 w/u's in What's in your CD player?.
    -I left the ones which did not have massive downvotes. This is a vote dump site and needs Superfunding. (Oh, wait, I cleaned it up for Free!)
  • Who wants a random present from Juliet? with a ton of w/u's.
    -Hey, she said the expiration date was 7/17/00. That was a long time ago, eh?
  • 6 w/u's in First Kiss.
    -Just the ones that were a couple of meaningless words. However, I see a gleaming city on the hill where all nodes such as this are tossed over the edge while the crowds cheer in wild abandon.
  • Fuck the prom queen by PMD. User /msg'd.
    -Again, I tell you, these useless nodes have to begone, but they are sure to get noticed more quickly w/ "fuck" in the title.
  • emmet swimming by realgb. 11/13. No links.
  • The baby Jesus can just suck it up by shoegazer. User /msg'd.
    -You know, if the kid didn't live where I do, I wouldn't care so much.

Wharfinger emerges from his cave deep below the ocean. He slouches toward Heorot with blood on his maddened mind, and the sweet sounds of Neko Case in his ears . . .

  • Upper Baboonasshole by bobort (never on E2): "A community of anarchy located 6 blocks east of mars." Wrong. It's a dysphemism for "West Bumblefuck" or "Podunk", used in Naked Lunch. If memory serves, you spelled it wrong: I'm pretty sure it's "Baboonsasshole". I don't feel like wading into Naked Lunch right now to check. The writeup is worthless by any standards, and I think we can kill the nodeshell because the Old Man himself is no longer around on this earth to fill it.

    Now that the nodeshell is gone, a search turns up "Upper Peninsula" . . . coincidence, I'm sure . . .

  • middle ages by hapsi (never seen on E2): "Era between the Greeks and the Renaissance." Yes, and Boston is between Tierra del Fuego and Kendall Square. Next? hapsi's other writeups are fine (okay, "acceptable"); I don't know what got into him there.

  • Trondheim by zyntax: 95% plagiarized. I requested a rewrite the day he noded it, August 31; all he did was rephrase the first sentence slightly. Well, I wasn't kidding. Several of zyntax's writeups are plagiarized, all from the same source: This one was from I /msg'd him about this, in the forlorn hope that he will fix the others.

Nodeshells worth 'nihilating:

Wharfinger senses a tremor in the gel, and smells/tastes/feels the departure of much mousepad-shaped wrongness. Many wrong/bad/not-done shapes are gone. He is glad. The goodness of the gel comforts him. Good gel. Lovely gel. He feeds on the gel, delicately mauling it with his mandibles and chelicerae. The gel cradles his sleepy head and soothes his tired eyes. Goodnight, sweet gel, and choirs of Tacoman neo-country slackers sing thee to thy rest . . .

{bulldyke} : requested clarification. none, inevitably, will be forthcoming {The Writer's Apology} some pompous ass can't spell /msg PMD there are some errors in {Daisy Miller}: "recommend", not "reccommend" (pgh 1), "free rein", not "reign" (pgh 3), "should never *have* been give the opportunity" (pgh 5)
Killed Robert25's writeup The Spider Monkey because it was an uncredited ripoff of Naughty plagiarist! No biscuit for you!

Similar kills for the same reason:

Botham burger
Glowing Pickle
Spam {or other mirrors of the same source)
Tennis balls
Tidy Cat

Took a break from auditing the rest of his cut-and-paste spree and got roundly cussed out by the user: Why for fuck's sake this, god damn it that, you get the idea. I believe he's beginning to calm down and start crediting the work he copies. I'd enjoy seeing that.

Then I savagely nuked my own writeup, in Sweden, because I really deserved it. What the hell was I thinking? That writeup stank.

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