display | more...
Hereinafter are set down the characteristics of stereotypical student club night. It's not all like this (I work at a student venue myself), but this is a run down of the canonical bad student night.

The student dislikes a club playing music that they don't know. As a result, there are two options available: cheese and indie. The cheese is just that, although you may find that it's acquired an adjective to become, for example, funky cheese, pop cheese or 80s cheese. The development of underground cheese is awaited with interest. Indie initially sounds more promising, but ends up consisting of the same bunch of mid 90s britpop tunes, along with a bit of 'indie-dance' including, inevitably, Size of a Cow and Sit Down.

If the night is organised by, and not just targeted at, students, then the venue will be awful. Some decks will have been set up in one corner of the bar. There will be some cheap disco lights. You'll probably all be turfed out at an early hour. If the organisers made an effort, there may be a theme, which normally boils down to 'women in as few clothes as possible.'

The drinks of choice for a student night out are watered down lager, snakebite and black, vodka and coke or alcopops. People may smoke weed, but traditional clubbing drugs are generally avoided.

Student dancing normally involves keeping your legs entirely still, while swinging your arms vaguely in time with the music. The amount and complexity of the swinging is determined by how good a dancer the student thinks they are: this usually increases as they get more drunk. The exception to this rule is that in every group of students, there's one who can dance in an impressive manner, usually involving mild body popping, and will do so briefly to a rapt audience before the general arm swinging resumes.

Student clubbing is also a popular sport among scallies in the north of England.

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.