I saw her tonight for the first time in three years. It's been almost five since we broke up. Two months since I broke up with my last girlfriend. She's just as beautiful as ever, just as delightfully sparkling with life.

We went to Ale House after I got off of work, and I promised her as much booze and food as she needed to forget her own shitty day. We got a table on the patio, I ordered a cider, she ordered a pitcher of something blue that was full of vodka. Eventually, she ordered spinach dip.

In the meantime, she and I talked about her children, about work, about her ex-husband, and how much I hate him. About how much I love her. About how she loves me, but how we can't be together. About how we're both okay with that. I cried when she showed me a video of her daughter, growing like a weed and singing like a nightingale.

And eventually, as all evenings do, things came to a close. She walked me to my car. We kissed each other goodnight. I walked her back to her car. Another kiss goodbye.

And now I'm home, writing something for the first time in five years.