I fucking hate catch-22's. My grandmother was put back in the hospital again late last week.. and my grandfather is ill.. just like last time.. he worries about her so much.. he makes himself ill.. I hate seeing them suffer.. My mom is a basket case.. it sounds so horrible.. but I wish they would all go in a airplane crash.. quick, painless, and together.. I can deal with my grief.. but if my grandmother dies.. it will be the end of my grandfather.. and my mother would fall apart.. loosing both her parents quickly together.. it sounds so selfish.. but watching others I love grieve.. I feel so helpless because I can't ease their pain.. seeing them in pain just drives a knife in me..

I spent all day with my grandmother.. she worries about me.. she told me today she wants to see me here.. in Florida.. settled.. Settled. A big part of why I am still here is due to obligation I feel for my family.. blah blah only child, only grandchild.. She offered me a car.. heh and what great timing.. since I found out my car needs a new engine.. 6200 dollars I don't have.. I know she isn't doing it to bribe me.. she just thinks it's something that would make living here easier.. I don't care about the car.. but I couldn't bear the guilt of leaving for any serious length of time knowing I could be missing my grandmothers last days..

stress.. between money and worry.. and I can't let it show.. I need to be the strong one.. the one who is full of "it's all going to be wonderful".. I just feel as if I need to go in 50 different directions right now.. and not one of these directions are something I can sacrifice not going in.. for survival.. mental, financial, emotional, physical blah

I feel so useless right now in all my endeavors.

I just wish I knew the answer/s.

I know there is no easy solution.. and eventually something or things will have to give.. and it won't be easy etc.. and "this too shall pass" but I'm scared about the consequences of my actions.. the immediate ones.. and the not so immediate consequences.. I just wish I could at least have the satisfaction of knowing the people I care about aren't suffering.. but my suffering doesn't ease theirs.. I guess I feel as if right now.. I'm just not making it worse. I should be satisfied with that.. but it feels as if it all in vain.. I guess it is.. argh.

. . .

"I really have no what idea to do right now." That statement applies to my life and my state of mind on so many levels. I have no idea to do about my family.. there is really nothing I can do other than what I am.. I am here, as I have been much longer than I intended. I don't see that changing on any permanent level until something to do with the situation changes. This is fine. I can bide my time here, except that it's sending me into financial debt. I don't care about being poor right now, or student loan debt.. but this is much more dire debt.. but to reverse the situation really isn't an option. I am left with just dealing with it like quicksand.. I work to get out.. but I still sink. I guess that will just be awful to fully get out of later, but as far as I sink now.. I won't drown.. I will just choke a bit. I really laugh at the fact that all this stuff distracts me from the mess that is my social life on a personal level. It's slightly amusing. Nevermind my mental health, or lack there of.. haha.. ugh.. but in all seriousness.. I just have this feeling that all this time in Florida is leading me down a bad road where that stuff is concerned. I'm not really sure how or why.. I guess I isolate myself a lot when I am down here, partly due to preference and partly to circumstance. Allowing myself time to rip myself and psyche apart on a daily basis.. instead of doing silly spontaneous things. My social spontaneity is really only acted on when I am being social! I've been trying to work on that though.. I've seen people I haven't seen in months or years.. I just need to learn how to not let the overwhelming drain of a reason for being here is, push over into my being happy when being social in Florida -- and not to avoid doing that by being reclusive. babble babble..

I am a such a master of the obvious. I just realized a lot of my preferred Floridian hermetic behavior is due to the lack of control I feel over my life right now. I mean.. years ago when I was here I subscribed to the idea of "victim of circumstance and fate".. but that's what's so different. The fact that I feel so trapped by realistic and responsible options, totally violates my philosophy of "doing something" if you are unhappy.. doing something to change the circumstance.. even if the something doesn't make it immediately better.. it's at least taking some control and responsibility for one's fate. While I am in control of my fate, and responsible for my circumstances.. it's this passive aggressive control I have right now. At the same time it just reinforces my fears of what's going to be my next challenge down the road.. fear of the unknown.. because I am not even at the point where I have to face the fear.. I just have the scary "coming soon" previews, but without any real information to use to plan and analyze how I will deal with "what's coming soon" ..