I am aware that, to a large part, I am preaching to the choir on this one. There are, however, a few individuals who mope around #e complaining about lady-troubles. So, Kit_Lo, here is a step-by-step guide on How to Pick up Girls.


Prerequisites and Direction of this Howto

      We are assuming that girls are your sexual preference, and that you are a male. If someone wants to add guides for the opposite sex or for different sexual orientations, that would be more than interesting. However, this one assumes that you are male and not a flaming misogynist. If you are under twenty-one, get a fake ID. It helps if you are at least able to buy drinks.
The target audience is someone who can't tell up from down dating-wise, and their target audience will be girls looking to meet guys. We're talking basic-basic human interaction here, people. If you're trying to meet a girl who is intelligent, trustworthy and good looking, make female friends and network it. (Notice how much calmer and rational things are when you're dealing with a closed set of intelligent individuals?)


Get a lead

      Congregate where attractive girls do. This is superficial but efficient, as they tend to be well-versed in this two step process and less likely to be in your awkward predicament. Go to clubs, bars, parties, etc, preferrably with friends, and talk to a number of people. If you don't have the guts to do that, then you aren't ready for a full-on relationship. If someone is hanging out in a club/bar/party, they won't mind being talked to, as long as you remain respectable. Possible opening lines include: "Hey, I couldn't help but overhear you talking about William Faulkner - have you read a lot of his works?" or "I love that outfit you're wearing, the color truly complements your eyes." Use any clues you have, avoid pick-up lines or general statements - you don't want to come off as the base-minded misogynist you are. The best way to pick up people of the opposite sex is to appear as if you aren't trying to. Also, let her talk - show her that you are willing to listen, and talk about things she brings up.
      If one appears interesting, maintain conversation and keep an eye open for clues of interest. Such clues can range from non-stop smiling to her singing love songs to you and doing favors such as ordering drinks, etc. If these signs do not appear, move on and talk to someone across the room. If she does appear interested, keep talking. Find out if this is the type of person you would want to spend time with, and if so, get her phone number or email address and pay for her drinks.


Establish contact

      The respectable wait time before calling her is about two days. Who am I to say this? Well, for one, I'm writing this and you're reading, so you better believe it. This is plenty of time for her to wonder if you will call or not, and maybe even wait for your call. At the night of the second day, pick up your phone / mailto: and hook it up. Converse briefly and set up a date for later on that week. Being a misogynistic bastard, I like to propose a place to eat/stuff to do, as well as plan out the evening. Make reservations, clean your car, and most importantly be on time. This is all about first impressions, people.

Congratulations, you have just picked up a girl. Chances are she's not what you're looking for in a person, so we'll have to return to square one.

Consider reevaluating what you are truly looking for. If you find someone you get along with great, the rest will follow. Appearance is overvalued. But go ahead, learn the hard way, you're paying. =)