Okay everyone, this is my first node. I'm still trying to make some links. I wrote this story to tell to an ex-boyfriend of mine who was heavily into drugs. I realize the situation doesn't apply to everyone, because the beginning is a bit contrived, but it's basically a visualization exercise. It works best when you have someone read it to you, so you can close your eyes and imagine.
Imagine you are sitting in your room with your girl/boyfriend. The two of you are doing drugs.. You start to get really dizzy and as the room spins, you pass out. When you open your eyes, you see a beautiful angel. You can picture her face clearly. It seems oddly comforting, and you feel very safe in her arms. Why?
You realize that you are being carried. She carries you up into the air and far, far away. Away from everyone and everything. She carries you to your favorite place in the whole world. You look around and there's nowhere you'd rather be. Just as your feet touch the ground, you look up at the angel, only to see that she's crying. You are
puzzled, and the moment you blink, and she's gone. You look around at the scenery. It's so beautiful. Everything is calm and soothing. Your eye catches a butterfly, flying through the air. It flutters by, and soon it is so far away it is a mere dot on the horizon. You wonder to yourself, where could it be going in such a hurry?
All of the sudden, dark clouds rush in and fill the sky. You feel raindrops lick at your skin. You look up, and the rain begins to pour down over the landscape. It's a cold rain, nearly freezing. You turn to your left and there stands a friend of yours. They hand you their opened umbrella, and you grasp it tightly, grateful to have some shield from the storm. You start to thank them, but they place their finger over their lips, as if to say that no thanks are necessary. Just then, lightning strikes off in the distance and catches your eye. You look back to where your friend was standing, but they're no longer there. As you start to shiver, you look around and realize you're somewhere else. You think, what's going on?
You turn and see you are in a graveyard, and it is still pouring down raining. You gaze off into the distance and see a group of people gathered, all in black. Who could be having a funeral on such a horrible day? You begin to walk toward the group and you hear a preacher's voice, slow and solemn. In the short few steps you traveled, you are suddenly much closer than you thought. You walk through the group of strangers, none of them seeming to notice you are even there. Can they see you?
You reach the coffin and peer inside. You jump back, startled, realizing the person in the coffin is you. But are you really dead?
As you step back into the crowd, you hear the women sobbing. You begin to look at the people around you and notice their faces. There, to your left, stands your family. They all stand there, holding umbrellas, crying. You see your mother's face; she looks as if she would rather be the one in the coffin. You call out to her, but she doesn't seem to hear you. Her face remains unmoved.
You look away, and notice a small group standing to your right. Are these your friends? This handful of people? But where is everyone else? You tell yourself there would be more, but really, who wants to come to a funeral in the freezing rain. The rain. You almost forgot to be cold. But now, now the coldness sets in, along with the shock, slicing through you.
You look at them, this small group
huddled, all in black. Some are holding umbrellas, some are not. Some are comforting and holding on to others, some stand alone. You look at their faces, and you see the ones with tears streaming down them. One person in particular is crying the most. So much that they don't seem to notice, or care, that they're soaking wet. They don't even seem to notice the other people there. You stare at this one person, amazed. Are they really that upset? Is it possible they love you that much?
A bright light flashes off in the distance, distracting you. You look up and decide to follow your curiosity. You walk toward the light, and as you walk, you look around and realize you're in a long hallway. Suddenly there are people rushing about you, carrying backpacks, groups huddled everywhere, talking. You walk down the hall. Are you in a school?
As you continue down the hall, a bell rings, sending everyone rushing off to class. You wander around the hallway, peering into the windows of various classrooms. You recognize many of the people, but none of them seem to recognize you. In fact, they all seem to have forgotten about you. You peer into one classroom upon the next, and you hesitate, at one in particular. You look in the window, and notice the room is filled with many of your friends. Your eyes sweep the room, and as you're looking at the faces, one of them looks back. Can they see you? Is anyone else looking?
You look around the room, frantic to see if anyone else can see you. They can't. You look back at that one person. They look back at you and smile. But wait, what are they doing here? You open your mouth to speak to them, but they seem to have disappeared. Reluctantly, you continue to wander the hallway. You walk a long time until you realize the hall doesn't seem to be ending. You look around and you are no longer in a school. But where could you be?
You gaze down the long, white hall. All of the sudden, there are doctors and nurses rushing everywhere. You notice their faces, and can see them very clearly. They all seem worried about something. You realize you are in a hospital, but why?
The angel appears farther down the hall, beckoning you to follow her. She leads you into a small room. You hear the beep... beep... beep... of a heart monitor. You look to see doctors standing around a table, trying to save someone's life. You look at their faces, and sense certain urgency in them. You look at the unconscious body lying on the table, but that can't be you, you're already dead. Only it is. You step back, confused once again. You turn to ask the angel what's going on, but she's not there. Where did she go?
You look back at the scene before you, just in time to hear doctors shouting commands. Suddenly, you hear the long, continuous beep of the heart monitor. They cover your body with a sheet. You turn and there's the angel. Again, she motions for you to follow. You take her hand once again as she leads you into the next room. The scene before you is the same as the last, only this time the angel never leaves. Instead, she holds your hand as you watch the doctor's trying to save your life once more. You wait to hear the continuous beep, for your heart to stop beating, but it doesn't. The heart monitor continues to beep and you hear one of the doctors say, "We did it. I think this one's going to live."
You blink, and when you open your eyes, you are lying on the operating table. Once again, you see the
beautiful face of the angel as she floats above you. You slowly close your eyes as she kisses your forehead, and when you open them, she is gone. In her place, you find the faces of your family and friends. They are all gathered around your hospital bed. You're alive. As you look around the room at all of their faces, you make out the faint sound of an angelic voice saying, "What did you see?"
Okay, now this is where you ask yourself exactly what did you see. Questions I usually ask people are:
* What does the angel look like? Does she look like anyone you know?
* What place does she carry you to?
* What color is the butterfly?
* Where is it going?
* Who is your friend that hands you the umbrella?
* Who is the person who's crying the most at your funeral?
* Who is the person in the classroom?
* Why does the angel keep leaving you?