The Revolution Will Not Be Webcast
With apologies to Gil Scott-Heron.
To be spoken over a funky bass line, drum set, and flute improvisation.
You will not be able to stay home, brother.
You will not be able to jack in, log on, and zone out.
You will not be able to download pr0n and warez,
Eat ramen while waiting for a Flash movie to load,
Because the revolution will not be webcast.
The revolution will not be webcast.
The revolution will not be load-balanced by Akamai
Across huge server farms to maintain the proper bandwidth.
The revolution will not bring you .jpgs of Bill Gates
Giving a Powerpoint presentation with Steve
Ballmer, Jeff Raikes, and Craig Mundie to demonstrate
How .NET will change your computing experience.
The revolution will not be webcast.
The revolution will not be served to you by
Scott McNealy's Sun Microsystems and will not
feature a backend by Larry Ellison's Oracle.
The revolution will not help you Make Money Fast.
The revolution will not sell you All-natural herbal viagra supplements
The revolution will not let you punch the monkey
To win twenty dollars, because
The revolution will not be webcast, brother.
There will be no pictures of Sam Donaldson and Vint Cerf
At the Webby Awards in San Francisco with
Academy of Digital Arts and Sciences members Matt Groening and Beck.
Plastic, Peter Pan, PBS and Plus Magazine
Are not going to win crap.
The revolution will not be webcast.
There will be no pictures of pigs shooting down
WTO Protesters on indymedia.com
There will be no pictures of ICANN board members
Receiving bribes from Network Solutions, Inc.
There will be no Real Video or JPEG stills of John
C. Dvorak muttering conspiracy theories and no articles by
Jon Katz with the bleeding heart that he had been saving
For just the proper occasion.
Wired News, Salon.com, and Slashdot.org
will no longer be so damned relevant, and
No one will care what Wil Wheaton has to
Say on his weblog because the geeks
will be in the streets looking for a brighter day.
The revolution will not be webcast.
There will be no pages of webcams refreshing every
30 seconds with no pictures of half-naked women
Prancing and pimply-faced males scratching themselves.
The theme song will not be posted to MP3.com and
Will not be shared using Napster, Audiogalaxy, Gnutella,
iMesh, BearShare or Kazaa.
The revolution will not be webcast.
The revolution will never return a 404 Not Found,
403 Forbidden, or 500 Internal Server Error.
You will never have to worry about the virus in your
Email, the cracker at your firewall, or the bug in your OS.
The revolution will not waste 2 million dollars on a Superbowl Ad.
The revolution will not find you job opportunities.
The revolution WILL put you in the driver's seat.
The revolution will not be webcast, WILL not be webcast,
WILL NOT BE WEBCAST.
The revolution will not be in cyberspace, brothers;
The revolution will be live.