Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "As it turned out, Jesus was a kind motivator, but ultimately a nightmarishly bad baseball player."

• It all turned out all right but there was so much pain along the way
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• what I thought was going to be a turtleneck turned out to be a dickey
• The good guys and the bad guys were on the back of the boat and I swear I only turned my back for a MINUTE but when I came back, they'd killed Mozart.
• It's too bad she won't live. But then again, who does?
• Jesus was a reactionary reformer, just like Martin Luther in later years.
• I didn't mean to write this, but this is how it came out
• I Turned Out a Punk
• Jewish Baseball Players
• I can get away with murder, but I can't get you out of my head
• The last girl I dated was a vegetarian. We couldn't go anywhere and so it just didn't work out.
• when i wake up i can't remember what it was. it's so hard to smuggle something out of a dream.
• He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• I don't know if these are good flowers or bad flowers, but I picked them for you
• Was Jesus resurrected as the Easter Bunny?
• i thought i was special, but it was you
• untie the boat and turn on the water i'm gone i'm gone i'm gone but it's alright
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• I Fell Out of School, and All I Found Was This Necklace
• God was creepier than I expected so I took it out on the little people
• Jesus said, "I love him, for he is my brother." He was talking about everyone.
• Turn the dark cloud inside out
• the cutest baker in the room was making sadfaces at me when i walked out
• Will the last to leave kindly turn out the light?
• If you were team captain in a pick-up game of baseball and had Jesus Christ on your team, what position would you play him?
• Peace out boy scout, don't use your knot tying skills for bad ideas
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• strange and too short but I was lonely
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• I see it on the TV and I laugh out loud, but it's the way I feel right now.
• If someone punches you out of hatred, they're definitely a villain. But that doesn't mean that you're a hero.
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• I love you, but it's cold out here
• we went to the stars, but all we found was ourselves
• Jesus was a revolutionary
• Jesus was a black man
• There Is No Such Thing As Light/There Is No Such Thing As Darkness/This Shadow Is An Illusion/But Illusions Are Still Real/And I Still Must Step Out Of It
• Usually, if you've seen one bald man in a robe, you've seen 'em all, but most of them aren't burning alive from the inside out
• The one thing Superman was bad at
• The Tale of a Youth who set out to learn what Fear was
• Jesus was not a reactionary reformer, learn your history bud!
• Well, I guess I know enough to turn you inside out, old gal, you sockdologizing old man-trap!
• In a quiet grove of pines under a frosty sky, he helped her out of the sack. She wore severe white hospital pajamas and was beautiful.
• when life was kind and we were two young wide-eyed believers
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• How to turn a CD-ROM drive into a CD player
• Bad Boys Rape Our Young Girls But Violet Gives Willingly
• The class valedictorian was still tripping balls when he was bailed out in time to give the commencement speech at graduation
• I worked at the mall in the 80s. There was a cult that used to recruit out on the front steps.
• The kind of gods that crawl out of the rubble of a shattered place, full of shadow and sadness and obsession
• Why is it bad to make gays bishops, but okay to kill them?
• Baseball players with mullets
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• one kiss: bad for me, but i give in so easily. i'm weak.
• I can't remember why I thought this was a bad idea
• I may dream in technicolor, but I trip the fuck out in old-school black and white
• the desert was once alive, but I don't remember it
• Little lights that don't blink off but fade out instead
• How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
• I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
• Jesus died for somebody's sins, but not mine
• Into the Heart of the Whole :: Anderry Inne, But Not Out Again
• I wrote you a letter on the bus back from the city, but that's a different kind of weary
• You suckers still fucking node, but your noding wisdom. My bad.
• He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
• The virgin was looking apprehensive about the whole ordeal, but for the right amount of cash anyone will take on a horse
• but fuck, it was Sunday and the church bells hadn't even called the faithful
• The serpent was in the garden again, but there weren't any apples left in the tree, so I figured things were cool.
• I was shaking, but not from the cold
• There was silence in my heart, but you found a way to break it.
• It was a dream. But it wasn't a dream.
• Noding for Numbers sure was silly, but it sure is better than Dada Fascism
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• If the King's English was good enough for Jesus
• Jesus was a Gay Black Hippie Jew
• Jesus was a liberal
• After all, the Bible says Jesus' first miraculous sign was to make 180 gallons of wine for a party!
• I try to write you a love song but it comes out a lament
• Can I play with your breasts? Yes, but don't get out of the yard.
• Last time I checked, Buddha was not just some lameass winamp skin for Jesus
• On the beach, by myself. How it turned out.
• The day I found out I was a guy
• Trying to catch one clear promise out of the jittery confused language the night was whispering
• Finding the origin of a Hotmail message
• I can prove that Jesus was both human and divine
• It turns out wanting something doesn't make it real
• Turn On, Tune In, Rock Out
• And Then Nothing Turned Itself Inside Out
• I Dropped Out of School, and All I Got Was This Necklace
• And as the dreaming was danced, a sound went out
• TURN THAT MOTHER OUT
• Ah, if you should turn out to be a fairy I don't think I'd put you in a jar
• was jesus a mystic?
• Sex and death have both spat me out like spoiled milk for the same reason. I was not afraid.
• It turns out there are lots of badasses out there flipping coins.
• It was something that sang out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
• I turned Quizro into a Quiet Riot CD, and all I got was this jar of lemon-flavoured pickles.
• So I turned round and there was an inflatable man sat at the table
• It was something that sand out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
• She was coming out as he was going in.
• Jesus was a Gay Black Hippie Jew (song only) (recording)
• i turned bad
• How to find out if an egg has gone bad
• Maybe it's bad manners, but you still can't buy my baby
• Was the Alexandria baseball shooting a Trump False Flag?
• Major League Baseball Players Association
• 2016 was bad enough. Is it only going to get worse?
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• but you wanna be bad
• When she was bad
• This one goes out to you - not so much the people in the audience, but more the people in my mind
• There was a lot of blood, but the boys needed it
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• Fall tried to come this week but Summer chased it out of town.
• She really does want to clap along, but at the same time she doesn't want to let the bird get out.
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• I suppose I could have married a World Cup soccer player, but I didn't
• Starving in the greenhouse
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• I love my cigar, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while
• Once upon a time there was an ocean but now there is a mountain range.
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• The flowers smiled, but she was gone
• You can take the mall out of the ghetto, but you can't take the ghetto out of the mall
• The Tesla Coil made me cry, but I got a free lunch out of it.
• Why is windows-bashing okay, but Linux-bashing bad?
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• But you can't take the Jungle out of the Tiger
• I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
• Once upon a time there was light in my life, but now there's only love in the dark
• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• We're not running out of electrons any time soon, but dreams are in short supply.
• The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
• But what kind of violence would not be natural? Is not cruelty natural?
• /but what was the question?
• I will tell you the phrase, but you must never speak it out loud. If you do, you will surely die.
• The Box Said 'Do NOT Open" But The Seal Was Already Broken
• I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
• the fire burned and burned; it was so great and now so much time has passed and the fire is still burning, but it requires attendance
• but we turn everything we touch to shit; we just can't let beauty stand
• Jesus was Mexican
• Just how perfect was Jesus?
• Jesus was a feminist
• Jesus I was evil
• You noders still fucking suck, but your needing my wisdoms bad
• I'm wishing Jesus was here again
• Out of practice but my heart hurts so
• I was in heaven, I was in hell. Believed in niether but feared them as well.
• I was burned and bleeding, but the galaxy still spun on
• Flushing out your enemies from their lair with bad rock music
• Everything kind of creeps me out
• Two out of three ain't bad
• Turn On, Tune In, Drop Out
• It was really hot, in a Silent Hill kind of way
• I'll tell you what kind of guy I was
• Jesus Was a One Beer Queer
• turn out
• Out of turn
• Like white light? Or a long low moan that turns into laughing? Or the holes in Jesus' hands?
• Jesus driving out the Temple moneychangers
• The sexuality and marital status of Jesus
• You find yourself being chased not only by the bad guys, but also by what should be the good guys
• Big Bad Wolf
• Bad math teacher
• Bad Company
• Why fucking cows is a bad idea
• How can idealism be a bad thing?
• I Kissed "Weird Al" Yankovic and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt
• Bad kisser
• Mace Windu is a bad motherfucker
• Bad habits of the orangutans at the National Zoo

If you Log in you could create a "As it turned out, Jesus was a kind motivator, but ultimately a nightmarishly bad baseball player." node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.