Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "I'm not literally blind without my glasses but I am pretty damn nearsighted"

• I would've taken an axe to it, but I'm pretty sure the dryad would have pulverized me
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• I keep thinking I'm so tough but I rarely care enough to prove it. So am I really tough then? Or does every dog just have its day?
• I'm not really okay with being hated for what I am. It's hard to take. But it's still better than being loved for something I'm not.
• Yeah I can love my fellow man; but I'm damned if I'll love yours.
• I'm no better off with a car than I am without one
• I am in love with so much more than your body heat, but let's start there
• Damn it, I'm a Satan Worshipper
• I'm cold, but I'm happy
• Correct me if I'm wrong, and if I am, I'll eat a bug
• I'm poor, but I'm happy
• I will make him promises, but not ones I am afraid to break
• I'm damn sociable for a hermit
• I'm not a rocket scientist, but
• I am but higher
• She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
• I'm not a doctor, but I play one on TV
• as you get older, a lot falls away. but i am not here to tell you not to worry. i am here to give you tools.
• I am afraid to breathe or shut my eyes but I do both.
• I know I am but summer to your heart,
• I'm no fucking Buddhist, but this is Enlightenment.
• On the one hand my life is in danger, but on the other hand, I'm getting really stoned
• I ought to be grateful, but instead I'm angry
• But I'm a Cheerleader
• I am an adventurer not by choice, but by fate
• untie the boat and turn on the water i'm gone i'm gone i'm gone but it's alright
• I'm nothing but a flower falling off a winter stem
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• excuse the pencil but I'm inkless
• i'm not sure but i'm listening
• I'm at the station, but I can't get on the train
• i know you are but what am i
• Damn it, I'm a Superhero!
• Hot Damn glass cleaner
• Damn, I'm good.
• I may be lying in the gutter, but I am looking up at the stars
• i carry a deep sadness of the past, perhaps always. but i am here for the present and the future. i am here for you.
• I'm not a monster, Tom. Well, technically I am. I guess I am.
• I am nothing but my sins
• You may think I'm lying, but it's true
• I'm not anorexic, but I'm working on it
• I'm gay, but I'm not sure it's genetic
• I'm not racist but...
• I may be young, but I'm not naive
• I'm straight, but you might be the one
• Science without religion is lame; religion without science is blind
• I'm a nice guy...really, I am
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• Due to the Incompetence of our novice author, our heroine, cahla, finds herself in the wilds of Djibouti; there is no denouement in sight, but the moonlight is pretty.
• You're not laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka up
• pretty, but
• I Think I'm a Pervert, But I'm Totally Over It
• I note that she is pretty, but we are off into the city, my werewolf friend and I
• Someone has writer's block but I don't know if I'm him right now
• You don't see the light at the end of the tunnel now, but it's there. I'm holding it for you.
• one kiss: bad for me, but i give in so easily. i'm weak.
• I'm beginning to think that nothing I think or say makes sense to anyone but me
• With or Without You... but I prefer the latter
• I like electronic music, but I am not a raver.
• I am a mathematician, but I am also an artist
• I don't want to be a weeping mass of emotion, but I am
• He said I'm better off without you, 'til I showed him my tattoo
• Damn it! I'm an adult!
• I Am a Pretty Little Dutch Girl
• Feeling pretty damned academic
• I am no doubt moving. The question now is not where, but how. My life changes everyday. Big deal.
• Sorry, but I AM my fucking khakis
• I'm looking at the river, but I'm thinking of the sea
• I am many things, but I am not that strong
• when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
• Am I hurting anyone if I'm rich?
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• So runs my dream; but what am I?
• The bastards hung me in the spring of '25, but I am still alive.
• A carafe, that is a blind glass
• Am I the only one who walks alone under moonlight without fear?
• I know you're up there. I am but a discontented symbol birthed from the blood of your terrible pen.
• I know you are, but what am I?
• I am afraid to write tonight, but I must.
• I'm Henry The Eighth I Am
• I may not know anything but I know I'm not American
• I'm not a dyke just 'cause I shaved my head, but if it keeps certain people away, fuckin' A right on
• You're laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka down
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• I am but a moth before your flame
• I'm tone-deaf, but it's okay
• Being a dickhead
• Maybe I'm naive but this type of website bugs me
• I'm not religious, but I think I have a close relationship with God
• I'm not homophobic but...
• I'm not a god, but I'm working on it
• Depressing but probably true rules of life
• I'm not pregnant, but thanks for asking
• like you're blind but still can see
• I am blind when I want to be
• I'm not going to fire a 2 million dollar missile at a 10 dollar empty tent and hit a camel in the butt
• I'm so goddamned cruel to you. But you'll never know
• you laugh and then you cry but you're still laughing but you miss her so damn much
• The body's alive, but no head. I'm having a lot of trouble accepting it.
• On two concert, I'm shootive collective photo but small, fat, bald headed technologist be insane
• I'm sorry, but we can't watch the rest of MacBeth until it is censored
• I'm sorry sir, but it appears that the abyss hasn't put you on the guest list...
• echoes of her glisten in your eyes; i also tear but without linger
• Pretty Butt (user)
• It’s memories that I’m stealing, but you’re innocent when you dream
• Damn everything but the circus!
• That man has writer's block but I don't know if I'm him right now
• Ain't what I'm gonna be, ain't what I wanna be, but lord thank you I ain't what I used to be.
• Once and somewhere far away I might have found peace, but now I can't live without this city.
• They are all pretty but fading.
• If I am doomed to sweat my ass off in my own apartment, I feel better if I'm blasting music
• They think I'm crazy, but I know it's real
• I'm happy but you don't like me
• the struggle continues, but at least i know i'm not alone
• I can burn the hearts of the damned, but I can't stop the burning I feel for you
• I'm not sick but I'm not well
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• You're voting this sucka down now, but I'm going to laugh
• I don't Daylog but I'm Daylogging
• I'm not PMS-ing, I am just hormonally imbalanced
• I am capable of poetic language, but not always of poetry
• I'm tired of all this, I just wanted the damned E2 Poster (document)
• this writeup made me hungry like DAMN so I'm chinging it!
• When the aliens attack my workplace, I'm going to be so damn READY
• i might look like a grown person, but i'm just a tiny confused scientist
• Do you love me now, Daddy? Do you think I'm pretty?
• anonymous against the glass and without context
• I don't know why but I always love episodes without words. like just something about them makes me feel calm or something..
• But I'm a good person! Yeah great you wanna help me with this or what?
• You beat it in me, that part of you/But I'm gonna split us back in two
• Just as I am, Without One Plea
• am
• I am the Walrus
• I look better when I am wet
• You Am I
• I sucked a lot of cock to get where I am
• Am I my brother's keeper?
• Trans Am
• Why I am bitter and angry.
• I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General
• Now I am become death, the destroyer of worlds
• Texas A&M University
• I am not a hippie!
• I am not a big sister anymore
• Am I insane, or is it just wishful thinking?
• I am Joe's...
• I Am Invincible!
• Society made me what I am
• someone without tattoos clearly has a fear of pain, which means in the kitchen they are slow and useless, therefore the food is weak and empty
• And why, you ask, am I doing all this?
• I am yours
• I am in you
• I am a little world made cunningly
• I am afraid of permanence
• I am a rock
• Help Me I Am In Hell
• I am not a babysitter
• Am I in love or still on crack?
• I am now a college graduate
• Ack! Do not cook this! I am just noding this in a state of shock!
• Am I gay?
• All that I am and ever want to be
• I am scared by fluffy pink bunny rabbits
• I am the greatest!
• Right now I am floating
• I am a Christian
• I sometimes think I am too much
• I am not ashamed to be a consumer
• How am I doing?
• I Am the Very Model of a Modern Libertarian
• I am semi-Christian

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