Findings:

• I was in heaven, I was in hell. Believed in niether but feared them as well.
• Once upon a time there was an ocean but now there is a mountain range.
• I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
• The flowers smiled, but she was gone
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
• we went to the stars, but all we found was ourselves
• /but what was the question?
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• I was burned and bleeding, but the galaxy still spun on
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• The virgin was looking apprehensive about the whole ordeal, but for the right amount of cash anyone will take on a horse
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• strange and too short but I was lonely
• Trompe
• It was a dream. But it wasn't a dream.
• Once upon a time there was light in my life, but now there's only love in the dark
• the fire burned and burned; it was so great and now so much time has passed and the fire is still burning, but it requires attendance
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
• The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• the desert was once alive, but I don't remember it
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• I was shaking, but not from the cold
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit
• I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• There was silence in my heart, but you found a way to break it.
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• but fuck, it was Sunday and the church bells hadn't even called the faithful
• Noding for Numbers sure was silly, but it sure is better than Dada Fascism
• The Box Said 'Do NOT Open" But The Seal Was Already Broken
• i thought i was special, but it was you
• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• The serpent was in the garden again, but there weren't any apples left in the tree, so I figured things were cool.
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• There was a lot of blood, but the boys needed it
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• It all turned out all right but there was so much pain along the way
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• God was created in man's image
• I'll tell you what kind of guy I was
• Calvin Coolidge was the 30th President
• The cactus that told me my mom was asleep
• I was once stranded on a desert island
• The train station was fucking freezing and
• Born with the gift of laughter, and a sense that the world was mad
• Was I nearly as anti-consumerism as I had initially thought?
• Kilroy was here
• I was once stranded on a dessert island
• The Princess who was Hidden Underground
• I was into them after they were hip
• hodgepodge was just a one-night stand, apparently
• The male libido - or - How I was castrated by the 90's
• Why Socrates was really executed
• I woke up and thought it was Saturday
• Oxygen was the world's first pollutant
• Upon my indulgence, I was dissatisfied
• Descartes was wrong
• 'T was
• Here lies one whose name was writ in water
• That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
• The day I realized what being alive was
• Man was created in God's image
• "He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony
• Nobody cares if it was originally a nodeshell
• I wonder when I learned to smile when I was being hurt
• Which of the Bewitched Dicks was gay?
• Concrete, Washington
• As I Was Going to St Ives
• I was looking for you
• That Was Then, This is Now
• Once, everyone was a computer novice
• So I was cold chillin on the corner on a hot summer's day
• I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
• Imagine if your microwave was intelligent
• I was a homeless bum
• I was promised flying cars
• Back when grunge was still cool
• Vancouver, Washington
• Music was better in the old days
• Climbing cherry trees when I was younger
• It was not a weather balloon at Roswell
• What I wrote when I was missing David
• I was discovered by scientists, what will they call me?
• There was once a Man
• That was a joke, son.
• Fast-talking career gal who thought she was one of the boys
• Where were you when Kennedy was shot?
• Theories as to what was inside the briefcase in Pulp Fiction
• How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
• Why I was convinced I would die young
• You knew I was a rattlesnake when you picked me up
• Dawn was a lucky time to give birth
• I was aghast, yet intrigued
• There was a young lady of Riga
• When that cow would walk it was like she was dancing
• Marilyn Monroe was a size 16
• WoOz: 17 How the Balloon Was Launched
• The Story of the Envious Man and of Him Who Was Envied
• How was your trip to London, Dan?
• Why I didn't get my driver's license until I was 18
• I was taken by a honeymoon scam
• The Story of the Vizier Who Was Punished
• Was Jesus resurrected as the Easter Bunny?
• Removed from humanity, I realized I was just another distraction
• Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few
• What was the question?
• if music was a woman you would have a mistress
• when you asked what I was writing, this is what it was
• The first iron-on transfer I made myself was controversial
• There was a rose that faded young
• When I Was One-and-Twenty
• Lando was supposed to die
• I was never any good at maths at school
• being a kid was great
• There was this one great night at Alice's house,
• I once was a clueless young noder
• There was a time when I was a better person
• So I turned round and there was an inflatable man sat at the table
• I was going to marry Marty
• was
• Why was Cthulhu blue?
• This wasn't how it was supposed to be
• wa
• Able was I, ere I saw Elba
• The Walrus was Paul
• What would aliens think of us if Everything was all they had?
• I was expecting it to hurt like a fuck
• "Oskee wee wee! Oskee wa wa!"
• my only pin-up was Pelé
• No shit, there I was
• This was unexpected, my soul's connection to you
• A poem I wrote when I was 5
• And the sky was made of amethysts
• the seven hills of Rome
• I was once a victim of Catholic schooling
• When I was your age
• I was a young boy that had big plans
• How Candide Was Obliged to Leave the Fair Cunegund and the Old Woman
• It was a dark and stormy night
• It was you, Atthis
• The world was designed for giant squid
• Was not cleanly unmounted, check forced
• Just how perfect was Jesus?
• If Dr. Seuss Were a Tech Writer
• Was (Not Was)
• I was searching glass
• This product was tested on cute, furry animals with big, sad eyes
• Cybersex before it was cool
• If the King's English was good enough for Jesus
• No important data was harmed by the ILOVEYOU worm
• I Hear it was Charged Against Me
• It wasn't like I was sleeping anyway
• It was not a dream
• It was all God's fault

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