Findings:

• We don't have what we need because we can't stop wanting
• Badgers? We ain't got no badgers. We don't need no badgers. I don't have to show you any stinking badgers!
• We don't have time for this. None of us have time for any of this.
• I Don't Need to Have Children, I Date Them
• I will REMOVE your "All your radical touching base are already occurred to the lesbian monkey puppy" philosophy on me if you don't eat my soy google balls, hatt-baby. Real or malarky?
• The terrorists have already won "ANY BREAKFAST BAGEL SANDWICH" at McDonald's!
• i call my phone and i check my messages, but i don't have any messages
• because I have given up any care
• You don't always have to disagree, or agree for that matter
• When you have a trip planned, but don't go, you need to cancel your reservations
• And if I don't die or worse I'm going to need a nap
• or maybe a calm voice, that accent you don't think you have
• My soul is in a million pieces. I tried to collect most of them, but some are missing, and the ones I have don't fit together anymore. Feel free to take a piece or two.
• You don't have any real problems
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• You don't have to catch me. You don't need to bring me back.
• You need a license to have a dog, but any idiot can have a child
• These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
• Just when you get really good at something, you don't need to do it any more
• I don't have any secrets. Now ask me if I have any lies.
• We don't swim in yer toilet, so don't fuck us over or you'll need 2 wheelchairs, fool: An Partie
• I don't like her because she won't like me
• If the wibbly thing is part of your anatomy, I guarantee you don't want the cat batting at it or licking it.
• Don't shake it, bump it, or sniff it: The 2001 anthrax mail scare
• Your radical ideas about society, individualism, and religion have already occurred to others
• Your radical ideas about religion as a mechanism of social control have already occurred to others
• So what if your radical ideas have already occurred to others
• don't need no credit card to ride this train
• Your radical ideas about taking candy from thefez have already occurred to others
• Your radical ideas about New World Orders have already occurred to others
• No one has ever died because they DIDN'T have a toothpick
• If you are already walking impaired, take care when consuming drugs of any kind
• Your Radical Ideas about Capitalism as a Method for Social Control Have Already Occurred to Others
• All of your ideas have already occurred to others. Please stop bothering to think. You are selfishly wasting energy and oxygen.
• Don't assume that just because I'm promiscuous, all I want is sex
• Don't Need Love
• Archived E2 FAQ: Why Don't I Have Votes Today? (document)
• Your radical ideas about this being like David Foster Wallace have already occurred to others.
• We don't need no education
• World, take care of me. You don't owe it to me, but I don't know any better.
• Your radical ideas about philosophy have already occurred to others
• General sexuality newsgroup
• The mighty have fallen, and I don't feel too good myself
• Your radical ideas about roman numerals have already occurred to others
• I miss you because I have nothing else to miss
• Gifts we already have
• Did we listen to pop music because we were miserable? Or were we miserable because we listened to pop music?
• Because I needed to hear you over the noise
• The terrorists have already won
• there aren't any stars because we haven't created them yet
• I don't have a problem with Christians, it's Biblical Literalism I can't stand
• Ernie and Bert are not gay. They're puppets. They don't even have legs.
• I don't have a thing to wear!
• I have a Shaymus and you don't.
• Gays don't need us heteros to propagate gay stereotypes; they're doing just fine by themselves
• She makes sniffing sounds, and I don't know if she's snorting coke or weeping
• A reason to drink
• Because the weather is always beautiful, they don't even know that storms can be beautiful too.
• You don't need a reason to cry
• I don't have a postmodern condition; I've always been like this
• I don't know if these are good flowers or bad flowers, but I picked them for you
• Dead Men Don't Need Coffee Breaks
• E2 FAQ: Why Don't I Have Votes Today? (node_forward)
• I am attracted to gay men, famous actors, and men who live in different time zones or are already taken. It's safer that way.
• We Don't Need the Men
• No, I don't have channel 11
• Don't leave the house or you'll be shot for deserting.
• It's easier to kick a praying man, because he's on his knees already
• I don't need to read, I'm a writer
• You make yourself lonely even though you don't have to
• from where I stand I can see they have already won
• Your radical ideas about your radical ideas occurring to others have already occurred to others
• Come back safe; we don't want any dead heroes in this family
• Bernie would have won "ANY BREAKFAST BAGEL SANDWICH" at McDonald's
• Textbooks you save because there's that one chapter in back you refer to every two years or so
• I don't shiver because I'm cold. I shiver because you are.
• Don't Sit Next to Me, Just Because I'm Gay
• I can't be a scientist because I don't believe in God.
• I would like to return this bread because I don't like it
• because I am only half of what you need
• Buying things just because they have cool packaging
• Don't take any guff from those swine
• Dogs are for wimps who don't have the guts to bite people themselves
• I don't have a problem with Biblical Literalism, it's Christians I can't stand
• Do not have sex with horses. Seriously, don't.
• Your radical ideas about a twelve inch cock have already occurred to others
• Your radical ideas about softlinking a node with a title saying that the writer's radical ideas about this topic have already occurred to others have, in fact, already occurred to others
• We read your mail so you don't have to
• 2001: Why don't we have HAL?
• I have dreadlocks and I don't know where the pot is
• Cats don't have brakes
• Your radical ideas about many things have already occurred to others but have never been articulated in a fashion so accessible to current generations
• Your radical ideas about time traveling to July 29, 1947 to have a threesome with Marilyn Monroe and Jackie Kennedy have already occurred to others
• You do realize that this is not, in any meaningful sense, a martini, don't you?
• Thank god I don't have to make my living passing out bogus petitions
• Jesus loves you so I don't have to
• Mother died today. Or maybe yesterday, I don’t know.
• Don't touch, check with other passengers, inform station staff or dial 999
• You don't know what you have until it's gone
• I don't have a soul. But something still hurts.
• His actions have already scarred American history.
• The next mass extinction may have already begun.
• love like you don't need the money
• Why don't I have votes today?
• Work like you don't need the money
• Living well is only the best revenge if they don't have a fuckable sibling
• You don't need to pay us to respect the Deus
• what if the most important thing you will ever do you have already done?
• nor was there anything to be attained that you didn't already have
• A lot of houses don't even have anyone to board them up.
• Your radical ideas about the combinatoric implications of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator have already occurred to others
• Your radical ideas about every point being the center of the universe have already occurred to others
• If you're not sure whether or not you've been had, then you've already been had.
• you already have what it takes
• your radical ideas about hustling the bog pork have already occurred to others
• You don't even know the meaning of the word committed. I'm Andy Kaufman, motherfucker. I will die on this hill I made, in this battle I started, for this prize I already own.
• why I don't use Twitter or Facebook
• I don't believe in God or the soul but these machines can make me cry
• Reason #57 Why I Don't Have Children
• You don't need a weather man to know which way the wind blows
• The square root of any positive integer is either integral or irrational
• Is there any part of you that really wants this? Or is the pursuit like breathing to you?
• I am altering the deal. Pray I don't alter it any further.
• you have ghosts. where are they? are they so deep that the light cannot reach them? is there any such place?
• The tattoo phenomenon
• Don't Sit Next to Me Just Because I'm Asian
• we're part of something bigger than any one of us. i just feel lucky to have been chosen.
• The Story of Augustus who not have any Soup
• No one asks me if I'm a Satanist or anything because I take the precaution of wearing a predominantly flannel and hawaiian shirt-oriented wardrobe
• We don't write poetry because it's cute
• I don't care. I like who I am because of it.
• in spite (or perhaps because) of
• We know we have fallen because we know who we are
• Don't assume that just because I'm gay, all I want is sex
• or because we are all Supermen living in the city of the future
• i hope i make it out, because i have a lot to tell you
• any way, shape or form
• I can't get a haircut today because I have too much free time
• Let's hear that string part again, because I don't think they heard it
• Do not put this product into the rectum by using fingers or any mechanical device or applicator
• Just because you both have the same problem does not mean you are one another's solution
• How to determine whether a number is even or odd in any base
• Baptist jokes
• Baptist fear of dancing
• The reason people go to war is because they don't understand the feelings of others.
• Love the one you don't need
• I don't have a television set
• Information you don't need
• If you don't have anything to say, don't say anything
• Don't meddle in that which you have no desire to understand
• Look, I don't mean to be an asshole or anything, but...
• Hamster toys you need, and those you don't
• just because you don't doesn't mean you can't
• I just don't need help losing things; I'm good enough at that on my own
• I have a punklin and you don't
• Guys who don't tell you they have a girlfriend
• Stoned music memories
• I don't want to risk endangering the cheap, meaningless sex we have
• Does war have any redeeming features?
• And that's why we don't have sex in the nose
• Don't feel comfortable with girls? Have a daughter.
• So you don't have to
• I don't even have the energy to kill myself
• I don't have a life; Everyone else wants to live my life for me
• On my honor, I have not violated the honor code in any way on this work.
• If a given feature can't be found in a Freeware application, you don't need it
• You don't have to be a vegetarian to like vegetarian food
• How to scare the Hell out of a Lexus driver, or: Don't take sharp corners at 50mph in the rain
• Listen to me, because I am in the soapbox. This is the voice of the soapbox. I am calling to you. Do you hear the sounds of my soaply siren song? My syntactically sweet strumming along to sequential sequestrations of symmetrically snakey st
• Car commercials that won't let you have any fun
• If you don't play pinochle, you must have married in
• The New Face of the BSOD: An Adventure in Password Recovery
• Never imagine you have any idea what you're attracted to
• Work like you don't need the monkey
• Dogs don't have souls, so it doesn't matter
• If you don't know where you're going, any path will take you there
• Relax. Don't worry. Have a homebrew.
• If I don't care, I don't have to hurt
• You don't have to remember my name
• NODE OR DIE! Can you do any less?

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