Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "Beware lest when being kissed by the all-seeing Emperor, you step upon the elusive banana-peel."

• How to avoid being urinated upon by your baby boy
• When being chased by CIA trainees, don't mention Belgium to the waffle house physicist
• Since when did being spiritual matter? Since when did thread count matter?
• Disneyfying Shakespearean Tragedy
• Step By Step
• The Lovecraftian compulsion to keep noding even as one is being devoured by EDB
• My eyes change color when I kiss someone
• At night, when we walked by the wall, the world seemed to fall down before us - the whole, far-off, dirty world.
• only by consuming pieces of one another can beings such as we exist
• Step by Step System
• I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor
• It is her name that I think of when I think about being in love.
• When I too long have looked upon your face,
• A lie only hurts when it's told by people you care about
• If you become lucid, you realize history's greatest literature was being written as you read it ...by yourself.
• Guide to determining if you are constantly being mauled by bears
• Being pulled over by the cops for speeding
• I wonder when I learned to smile when I was being hurt
• being beaten into an unhealthy state by other people's pasts
• Being rejected by someone you really respect
• Being solicited for sex by people who don't even know your gender
• Being betrayed by one's own body
• When things are known by a brand name
• Good Friday Agreement : Comparable Steps by the Irish Government
• When she was new, she rolled around the sky like a black umbrella blown by the wind
• When life gives you lemons, grab it by the throat and demand better
• What happens when an unspeakable thing is discussed by a loquacious idiot?
• I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned
• When You Wish Upon a Star
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• When you are being sacrificed
• I'll pretend I just cursed myself by saying this, so when it doesn't happen I have something to fall back on other than you
• The reluctant backpacker's guide to being hit by lightning
• Being complicated is not fun, especially when not everyone agrees that you are
• Accidental death odds
• Notes on ruining the beauty of barren places by being there
• I don't even know when I am being sarcastic anymore
• A Nocturnal Upon Saint Lucy's Day, being the Shortest Day
• In the movie of his life, the part of Keanu Reeves will be played by a block of wood, and the critics will pan it for being too expressive
• your chances of being killed by a frog are low BUT NEVER ZERO
• Tell me a story about a burro, standing atop a mesa, surrounded by a flock of geese, being fed by a weathered old man wearing nothing but a Jimmy hat
• Two paintballs sit upon the black pseudo-timber chest of drawers by my bed
• Going by the script when talking to people
• This music crept by me upon the waters
• She will remember your heart when men are fairy tales in books written by rabbits
• When I'm swept up by the Rapture, grab the wheel of my pick-up
• Upon the Translation of the Psalms by Sir Philip Sidney, and the Countess of Pembroke, his Sister
• Ruminations on being run over by a dump truck
• If I'd have shot her when I met her, I'd be out of jail by now.
• When your imaginary life is interrupted unapologetically by your real one
• Rudeness is measured by context. The measure of rudeness upon a subject is inversely proportional to the subject's imposition.
• Steps To Being a Webmaster
• When your life is defined by a single action, it changes the concept of time.
• When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him
• Happiness is difficult to come by when one is constantly followed by Frisbees
• The Wild Colonials
• When we kiss I can hear your thoughts, so I would rather we didn't
• when all material scatters and ashes amplify the only place that matters is by your side
• you are a comet when you streak close by the radios get weak
• Grace and Fury walk with you, call each by name when the other has failed
• Despite being surrounded by perverts, I manage to have a great time
• You find yourself being chased not only by the bad guys, but also by what should be the good guys
• on being hit by lightning
• He makes me feel alone just by being there
• Being licked to death by kittens
• The relative risk of being attacked by a shark
• someday, when she will think back upon the time when she was as yet undishonored
• Being tickled in the neck by a girl you know a little bit
• Cease, then, being Emperor
• The dubious distinction of being criticized from the left by the Ku Klux Klan
• When did the future switch from being a promise to being a threat?
• BananaPeel (user)
• imperfect being (user)
• human being
• Are You Being Served?
• being close to another person
• Just being quiet and close
• The Unbearable Lightness of Being
• The difference between being "naked" and being "nekkid"
• Being and Nothingness
• The Importance of Being Earnest
• Two Golden Rules of Being a Woman
• Christians don't believe that "being good" gets anyone into Heaven
• you being in love
• World of Being
• Now that we're being so open and honest
• Evolutionary pressure against being evil
• Being a Christian is magical and foolish: Maybe we're all caught up in a collective psychosis
• Being a Green Mother
• Creativity, the essence of being human
• Being alone
• Being There
• The Need of Being Versed in Country Things
• Human being emulator
• Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs
• Being serious without taking yourself too seriously
• Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite
• what does being a sociological researcher entail?
• there's good and bad in being a database administrator
• The joy of Being a Technician
• Tell me a story about being really alive
• Why do some people enjoy being in nature?
• Supreme Beings of Leisure
• Why I think I'm a disgusting human being
• being a kid was great
• Being short
• The only thing worse than being uninformed, is being informed and not caring
• The curse of being named Tim
• being complimentary
• What's wrong with being independent
• Jewel not being mean for a minute
• Being really smart and taking lots and lots of drugs
• A sexist joke I'm allowed to tell, due to being a woman
• Reasons for Not Being at Work
• The Importance of Being Educated
• Sometimes, all you can be is a friend
• Kids are being trained to shoot people who chant in the forest
• at the thought of being close to you..
• dr's Hospital Adventure : it's weird being recognized as somewhat of a celebrity
• The honor of being a rat
• Being put on hold
• You are my electronic human being: my second chance, my way to mend the past.
• Why I hate being single
• "Gay" being used as an adjective for something bad
• The Everything guide to being a pizza driver
• Being an Eagle Scout no longer means anything
• Why are chimneys being demolished?
• Being Designated Driver on New Year's Eve
• The Greatest Fear In America Is That of Not Being Politically Correct
• I Enjoy Being a Girl
• famous for being famous
• Florida being promoted for its hockey
• she being Brand
• Well, I was tired of being 24 anyway, so there
• The trials and tribulations of being an E-mail technical support representative
• On being the Older Woman
• Imagine if you achieved a higher state of being from the Weather Channel
• Things I hate about being a conservative Republican
• Being the outsider at a party
• Why some people do not enjoy being in nature
• On the topic of being alone
• Great Chain of Being
• Adolescents: Beings of inherent evil
• Being with an older woman
• In a school with over 20,000 people, there is no danger of being recognized later
• The Story That Is Still Being Written
• The Importance of Being Earnest: Act III
• If you're being attacked, yell fire
• Being stoic, Daoist, and at one with the universe is NO FUN
• On Being the Right Size
• The new rulers of the world are being decided upon
• Her sleeves ride up on her arms when she moves
• Why is "Being There" Considered Better?
• He not busy being born is busy dying
• The Lovecraftian compulsion to keep writing even as one is being devoured
• Being rich is as much a trap as being poor
• Being both black and white
• the problem with being a member of the dominant culture
• It's a sin this not being ready, this not being up to it
• For the Time Being
• The disadvantages of being left handed
• Single Being
• What would aliens think if they talked to an average western human being?
• being true to your nature
• No one dreams of being a guidance counselor
• On Being the one who goes away
• The girls' guide to being a girl
• How to transcend animal instinct and become a superior being
• Being in a relationship is not a guarantee against loneliness
• The curse of being gifted
• Being Asian is rather like having large breasts
• Our obsessions almost killed me, but now here we are, talking like normal human beings
• All things being equal
• on being the only one in a restaurant
• being ill during exams
• Tired of being angry
• An hour later, I swing my leg over his and we dream of being young
• The day we were married the leftover doves from his days of being a magician hummed little love songs in the attic
• Bruxa Maria de Zuzaya is being tempted
• On being American

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