Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "If she were a senator, she'd be in someone's pocket right next to their Zippo and Zigzags"

• If she were an insect, she'd be a moth in search of a flame
• In the next six months, someone involved with Donald Trump will be involved in a legal proceeding
• They left the streets stained with blood, and their howling could be heard long after they were gone
• Although you are right, you were wrong to be confident
• but you should be right here, right next to me
• The Saudis were terrified that someone was going to be a better Muslim than they were
• All right. She can fly circles around Uranus, but where's the bathroom?
• She could be a businesswoman
• The next life will be better
• (she's a monster) she ate my heart
• She is not a girl, she is a woman. No, wait, she's a girl.
• I'm claiming the right to be unhappy
• You can still be very hurtful when you do what's right.
• If Christianity were true, why would there still be any Jews?
• If language were liquid, it would be rushing in
• Starling, you were right. I am the jealous kind.
• How can someone worship a dead naked man nailed to a cross as their god?
• He tells me that I could have his heart and I want to take it right then, slip it into my pocket and run
• may their names be sung forever
• Who Wants to be the Next US President?!
• Expecting your wedding to be the happiest day of your life
• I Was the Girl You Were Told Not to Be
• Once upon a time, I imagined she would be a river
• if i'm right, you'll be here to read this any day now
• They try to be quiet but you know they are there with their weird coppery breath.
• Susan Goldman, who has cervical cancer, is partly thankful as she braces herself but changes her mind as she's sprayed with burning jet fuel.
• We're going the right way. The forest goes deeper.
• There were only twelve raindrops, she counted them on the windshield under heavy soft skies
• More of The Story of Two Sisters Who Were Jealous of Their Younger Sister
• As if it were the arm of someone who'd pulled me back from speeding traffic.
• She opened her eyes and spoke in a very normal voice, just as if she were sane
• Oh be a fine girl kiss me right now sweetheart
• If you tolerate this your children will be next
• I will make your oppressors eat their own flesh and they shall be drunk with their own blood like wine
• she can scream so loud you'll be looking for your ears on the floor
• He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
• She teaches a night class. Psychology 100, to be precise.
• Her perception of how gorgeous she is will be evident in her lack of movement during sex
• You have the right to be angry at me for breaking my heart.
• i assume it is considered odd to be so fond of someone based on text alone
• It must be morning when she dreams.
• Together, we will be the oil drifts under the sea during the next incarnation of civilization
• If there were more people like you, there would be less people
• Sometimes friendships were meant to be destroyed
• She spent most of the day sleeping in my shirt pocket
• If anything were different, everything would be different
• She's found the hole in reality. She knows its depth.
• This is the first time she's texted me since the morning she left.
• Scissors that shed their safety
• You Were Right (user)
• every day she stands there, waiting. every day, she's gone when i get there.
• I felt as calm as the day outside. My footsteps were certain below the neutral sky. I wished there were someone watching.
• If only the spaghetti westerns were half as good as their titles
• What if I were born in someone else's life?
• You do not have a right to not be offended
• And when she turned into a man, we were so proud
• That's a valid point, but right now we're focusing on...
• I don't plan to be dismembered in the next three months
• It's all right to be filled with hate, people are stupid
• If you tolerate this piss then your bitter will be next
• A tentative laugh, she expected to be interrupted
• There will be nobody there to shed a tear
• She tells stories as if she knows what the ending will be.
• she's the reason the dust i finally leave will be better than the dust i came from
• I was throwing around useless proverbs when all she needed was to be held and told that she was beautiful
• Her self image was not the force field she imagined it to be
• The next time they would come, I would not be here.
• she can't remember what it's like to be found
• You do realise that this is going to be our lives for the next ten years?
• If you were a perfume, your name would be "Butterflies"
• The right to be wrong
• If only our tongues were made of glass, how much more careful we would be when we speak.
• Where we're headed, you'll be looking backwards
• We rode around the town late in the evening counting the streetlights to be sure all were burning
• Let there be another next time
• It's hard to be enthusiastic about music with someone who physically sneered at Hamilton
• There's a sign on the wall. But she wants to be sure. Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
• things that are wrong may yet be made right
• She Had to Be Sure
• If there were more people like you, there would be more people
• She was too beautiful to be human
• Each thing she learned became part of herself, to be used over and over in new adventures
• If I were Twenty-One I would "do the next thing"
• Someone has writer's block but I don't know if I'm him right now
• To promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts, by securing for limited Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings and Discoveries
• She's smarter than me but she's also more quiet, therefore she has no personality which makes me feel better
• Just because she's nice to you doesn't mean she wants to fuck you
• She makes sniffing sounds, and I don't know if she's snorting coke or weeping
• You're not going to be happy until you put someone's eye out
• she likes to dance on the edge. it's all she's known and she won't change now
• she lit a fire and now she's in my every thought
• If she really wanted to fit in, she'd get a smaller dog.
• When she woke up, her hands were still dreaming
• She shed
• On she went. The woods were deep and still.
• If She Were a Shipwreck
• She had never kissed someone so old.
• The stars were bright that night she left me forever
• Someone else's prayers were answered in ice
• Where were you when someone asked where you were when something happened
• How my plans to sell someone's soul on eBay were foiled
• The Story of Two Sisters Who Were Jealous of Their Younger Sister
• Their Eyes Were Watching God
• I didn’t know why it took girls so long to do their makeup until someone showed me how to dismantle the patriarchy with an allen wrench and a roast chicken ballotine.
• She just stares at us like we're crazy
• She was so pleased to learn that she was right
• Things to consider if you think someone might be dead
• Accept this, and your next breath will be infinitely sweeter.
• Pretending to be someone else online and talking to your real-life friends
• Be nice to smokers: any cigarette can be their last
• grumbling dissertation on how everything would be much better if it all were to explode
• Tears must be shed to make room for the laughter
• Choose your next witticism carefully Mr. Bond; it may be your last
• A kiss may not be the truth, but it is what we wish were true
• There are times when they seem to be right
• If you meet a strange, confident woman, she may well be a witch
• I come home, she lifted up her wings. I guess that this must be the place.
• It's not that we're more attractive in the darkness or that one of us may be drunk
• If I could be someone
• The Right To Be Offensive
• If we were all part of one big television show, seriously, you'd be a poorly written character
• Things never were what they used to be
• Someday, someone will be here unearthing my bones
• A Right to Be Hostile: A Boondocks Treasury
• If someone wants to do something and it isn't hurting you... DON'T BE A FUCKING DICK
• If ifs and ands were pots and pans there'd be no work for tinkers
• She must be what cocaine is like
• All the things she had at one point wanted to be
• people who were not to be trifled with; people who would dance, and had no notion of walking
• We'd all be better off if shaking hands were making love, and children were found in the cabbage patch.
• she couldn’t go and be beautiful
• With the Right Access, Anyone Can Be a Doctor
• when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
• people do, on the whole, have the right to be who they want to be
• She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
• If there were a slight, let it be fulsome
• It's better to be alone than to wish you were
• I really came to understand that they were just real people who wanted to live real lives and be treated equally as opposed to, for example, wanting to destroy us.
• Reasons why I am ecstatic to be alive right now
• If you were a vegetable, what kind of vegetable would you be? (registry)
• To women, to hide their teeth, if they be rotten or rusty
• When she shouts BE QUIET THE NEIGHBORS WILL HEAR IF YOU'RE NOT QUIET
• It will be a love story ... for she will be my heroine for all time
• "Life" appears to be a zero-sum structure, but we're running the numbers again
• There Must Be Someone
• You must be thinking of someone else on the Russsian front.
• Forming a bond with someone or something can be liberating in some ways. It can be limiting in other ways, until you unbind.
• If I were Twenty-One I would be happy
• "By their very nature, negatives ought to be more abstract {than positives}."
• do you want to understand? or do you want to be right?
• It's hard to be enthusiastic about reading and books with someone that openly admits to being a bad reader
• We're supposed to be gone. We're a universe of ghosts.
• every horse can be tamed by someone. but they don't always live at the same time.
• You are looking for someone who does not want to be found. Even if you find them it will not be a success.
• if everyone were 10% more good, there would be a 90% reduction in evil
• If I were Twenty-One I would determine, even if I could never be anything else in the world, that I would be a thoroughbred
• And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music
• Speed limits were made to be broken
• Real hackers start their own IRC networks so that they can't be traced by the FBI
• I gotta go right now. Someone is videotaping me in my spaceship.
• Inability to decide on what your morals and values should be
• Absolutely right, well done. And now, your next question is ...
• One must trust in the law, and keep within the heart the knowledge that the law of this world is the same right and just law that governed us when we were merely stars.
• English may be a "living language," but Latin is not -- so get it right.
• she's dreaming. a perfect life is right there on the pillow
• Surah 60 She that is to be Examined
• i keep my poetic license right next to my concealed weapons permit.
• Next time don't drop acid and down a dozen shots right before the rehearsal dinner
• If we define things as unreal, they may still be real in their consequences
• Lying next to someone at night
• The world would be in much better shape if our leaders were hamsters

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