Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "In reality the nodermeet was a blast! Thanks to everyone who was not out to get me and I'm sorry if anyone was unintentionally maligned by this fictitious account"

• everyone who ever told me i was pretty was lying.
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• I remember when it was me who made her skin flush
• I'm sorry, I didn't realize God was on campus today
• I remember when it was me who made her toilet flush
• I remember when it was me who made you want to take over the world and enslave humanity
• Sex and death have both spat me out like spoiled milk for the same reason. I was not afraid.
• The Tale of a Youth who set out to learn what Fear was
• I was discovered by scientists, what will they call me?
• I got the feeling the Fairy Council was mad at me when the president knocked over her coffee to get a better grip on my neck
• I said I was sorry. Then she looked at me.
• the cutest baker in the room was making sadfaces at me when i walked out
• I a man sad, with a linux box, a slow internet connection and friends who can not see the love in me bursting to get out.
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• I was raised on red pepper and blood. I am so hot if you strike me I will light like a match.
• There was a man who lived a life of fire
• I'm glad the evil overlord was on my team
• Why I politely asked the contemporary lit major I was dating to stop writing me love letters
• The Man Who Was Thursday
• I Fell Out of School, and All I Found Was This Necklace
• It was men who made breasts into a secret.
• She was coming out as he was going in.
• She was thinking of a boy in California who had a couch and a job
• She was watching me and I didn’t know it.
• it was years before they met again, by chance
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever a bear
• She was most amazed by the obvious, like January and the fact that I could not possibly keep her.
• My first and last attempt at a one night stand was raided by the police
• Once, everyone was a computer novice
• When I was a kid, I wanted to get tuberculosis
• No important data was harmed by the ILOVEYOU worm
• When she was new, she rolled around the sky like a black umbrella blown by the wind
• I was raised by the French government
• Death was a part of me then, too.
• I was hit by a train that doesn't really exist
• I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• This node was made for you and me
• There was a Man Dwelt by a Churchyard
• The Story of the Envious Man and of Him Who Was Envied
• Would you love me if I was a worm
• What I would do If I knew what was good for me
• The male libido - or - How I was castrated by the 90's
• God was creepier than I expected so I took it out on the little people
• Jesus said, "I love him, for he is my brother." He was talking about everyone.
• the space was filled with love like light and that made me shine as well
• when i wake up i can't remember what it was. it's so hard to smuggle something out of a dream.
• The class valedictorian was still tripping balls when he was bailed out in time to give the commencement speech at graduation
• When someone was willing to drown with me, I really didn't want to drown anymore
• Why I didn't get my driver's license until I was 18
• what I thought was going to be a turtleneck turned out to be a dickey
• That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
• He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
• Of Gods and Men: Who Was This Man Called the Christ?
• The boy who was picked last in gym class
• I used to think of sobriety as a purgatory, and that to be under the influence of drugs was relief from it. Now that I'm older I believe the opposite to be true.
• I Was Lost and You Found Me
• To a girl who thought she was moving away
• I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now
• I'm starting to think I was a waste of a perfectly good placenta
• btw, I was raised on Twinkies, I'm certain it made a lasting effect
• I'm Rudy Giuliani! I was mayor of New York on 9/11! I Should Be The President!
• You knew I was a rattlesnake when you picked me up
• I was taken by a honeymoon scam
• Okay, okay, I confess! It was me! I broke the internet!
• What was stolen by someone else
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• If I was the ocean, what would you be to me?
• Would you tell me if it was true?
• Before you, there was me
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• The one thing I wanted more than anything was for someone, just once, to tell me they don't know what they'd do without me
• My lunch money was stolen by a predatory Mars rover
• By morning I will have erased all traces that I was ever here
• The sound was starting to get stuck in my head like "It's a Small World"
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• Finding the origin of a Hotmail message
• If all you picked up tonight was this node title, it's time you went to a Brit nodermeet
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• I worked at the mall in the 80s. There was a cult that used to recruit out on the front steps.
• I Dropped Out of School, and All I Got Was This Necklace
• all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
• A Woman Who Never Was
• It was something that sand out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
• What if everyone was gay?
• The dynasty made people die in nasty ways. This mess was necessary and they're not sorry.
• I was the man who never lied. I never lied until today.
• I Fell In Love With A Girl Who Was Already Gone.
• Fast-talking career gal who thought she was one of the boys
• The virgin was looking apprehensive about the whole ordeal, but for the right amount of cash anyone will take on a horse
• Tribute to the Man Who Never Was (document)
• Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few
• I'm a celebrity... get me out of here!
• I'm wishing Jesus was here again
• Food which was intended as such by nature
• Of the Birth of Volsung, the Son of Rerir, who was the Son of Sigi
• Seriously, though, who the hell did I think I was going to become?
• The Man Who Was (user)
• The cactus that told me my mom was asleep
• what i'm trying to show you is something that i was shown
• I'm not a geek, and I wish I were
• I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
• Who shouted with glee when the colour blue was born?
• it doesn't matter who I was, all that matters is who I am
• Electronically, I was questioned by a mallard of flame…
• for a long time i was afraid i would forget; now i'm afraid i might not
• Existentialism is that girlfriend who cheated on you. Postmodernism is who she was with.
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• The German textbook that was written by Morrissey
• I was a homeless bum
• The Story of the Vizier Who Was Punished
• Jacques Chirac was shot in the head by a fascist named Jean-Marie Le Pen
• I Hear it was Charged Against Me
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• The Princess who was Hidden Underground
• You kissed me. It was sweet and timid.
• I was not made for love songs, and love songs will never be made for me.
• He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
• The train that came to me in the dream was already a dead train
• She was an intellectual prostitute, seducing me with profound truisms
• There was no one waiting for me...
• man when you are telling me how it was
• I was wrong as a child, to think old people were stupid for asking me where the day had gone. Now I understand... we older people do not live.
• I was put on hold for time to gnaw me raw.
• I was me before being me was cool.
• I Was Kidnapped By Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
• That Thursday the Universe was curved in the morning and was flat again by afternoon
• When I was little my mother told me not to sit close to the T.V., so when I was six I did.
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• By evening I will have returned all traces that I was ever here
• Just standing there, wearing my boxers, in my driveway. I was watching the stormfront. You were watching me.
• she was waylaid by an octopus
• My Singing was Stolen by Whispers to a False Friend
• It was too late by the time the robots came and I couldn't, I just couldn't
• If you become lucid, you realize history's greatest literature was being written as you read it ...by yourself.
• It all turned out all right but there was so much pain along the way
• smiling in photographs was a concept introduced by Kodak
• bringing me back to when less was worth more
• The rock under my foot that told me I was real when I was an adult
• Who Was the Wine Girl?
• What was once well planned in a mad girls mind, and is now quickly becoming a last minute nodermeet
• In a quiet grove of pines under a frosty sky, he helped her out of the sack. She wore severe white hospital pajamas and was beautiful.
• The day I found out I was a guy
• It was something that sang out while burning itself up, at the risk that nothing would be left.
• And as the dreaming was danced, a sound went out
• Trying to catch one clear promise out of the jittery confused language the night was whispering
• I met a girl in the garden who was doomed to die the next day.
• The last girl I dated was a vegetarian. We couldn't go anywhere and so it just didn't work out.
• every secret thing was made by some one
• You thought the silent treatment was as cold as it could get
• the seven hills of Rome
• Everyone Who Pretended To Like Me Is Gone
• Don't get me wrong; I'm not a feminist
• wa
• Kilroy was here
• What I wrote when I was missing David
• Here lies one whose name was writ in water
• Vancouver, Washington
• Was (Not Was)
• The Walrus was Paul
• It was not a weather balloon at Roswell
• Descartes was wrong
• Music was better in the old days
• I was expecting it to hurt like a fuck
• I can't think of anyone who could appreciate more than me your eyes and your voice
• Why was Cthulhu blue?
• To anyone who this may have hurt, please forgive me. The darkness keeps calling and I must go.
• No shit, there I was
• Why I was convinced I would die young
• Able was I, ere I saw Elba

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