Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "I'm the second-shift bartender. I tend the bar from about 8:00 to 16:00. My shift has happy hour, and usually the most alien customers."

• This is how it appears on Wikipedia and they tend to be somewhat anal about grammar, so I'm trusting this is correct
• Usually, if you've seen one bald man in a robe, you've seen 'em all, but most of them aren't burning alive from the inside out
• Things I've learned about lesbians from porn
• F1r3br4nd and the Night Shift from Hell: IX
• certain wisdoms about a place can only come from dying there
• The sex scene from IT and Hugh Hefner, and why I'm glad both are gone
• I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you.
• Ten things I hate about restaurant customers
• Searching E2 from a Mozilla location bar
• There's so much to think about. I'm getting distracted.
• You can tell a lot about a person from their e-mail address
• Someday soon, I'm going to save you from your life
• I'm against affirmative action and I'm benefiting from it.
• All about a Bombay dance bar.
• I'd love to go back to the late 80's and tell them about our time
• Stop saying "religion" when you mean "a particular religion about which I'm bitter"
• How to tell if a guy is circumcised from across the bar
• A word from anyone's alien
• Theories about the future that make you think "Holy shit, I'm scared!"
• We're acting happy to stop ourselves from going insane.
• 80% of the wealth on this planet is in the hands of about 220 people
• Tended Phoenix years from secret lair
• F1r3br4nd and the Night Shift from Hell: Epilogue
• I used to think of sobriety as a purgatory, and that to be under the influence of drugs was relief from it. Now that I'm older I believe the opposite to be true.
• Happy Hour at Club Limbo (document)
• I'm so shallow, a new t-shirt makes me happy
• two sips from the cup of human kindness and I'm shitfaced
• Westbound on Interstate 10, four hours from El Paso
• How can I talk about love when the bacon is burned and the house is an absolute mess and the children are screaming their heads off and I'm going to miss my bus?
• Harvey Mudd College Honor Code: Cases From the 80's
• I know what I'm talking about
• I'm All You Can Think About
• I'm talking about the kind of love that keeps you alive.
• "Ha ha," says the Israeli voter to the American voter, "don't talk to me about the lesser of two evils."
• just because i'm out on the balcony doesn't mean i'm about to jump
• The Most Cringeworthy Thing I Know About CSI: Cyber, Without Having Seen It
• heart medications which all have names like alien military from other planets
• Two men look from prison bars. One saw mud and one saw stars.
• Searching E2 from an Omniweb location bar
• The Mattel and Mars Bar Quick Energy Chocobot Hour
• I'm awake now. You know what I'm talkin' about?
• Laughing at what we call cloudbursts and showers and drizzles; knowing these are not subtle enough to mean anything about what comes from the heavens
• Tendency to shift blame keeps schools from improving
• F1r3br4nd and the Night Shift from Hell: VII
• The most direct path in my soul, is from me to you
• Happy Birthday From Planet Motherfucker (idea) mp3 (recording)
• It has all the majesty of butterflies emerging from their cocoons, and all the sounds of Aphex Twin
• Where I'm Calling From, A Grand Don't Come For Free
• As you graduate from college, you are the most conservative you will ever be
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• Wouldn't you think I'm the girl, the girl who has everything?
• I start reading from the end, because beginnings are the most exciting part
• Jonathan Ticklebutt has one of the universe's most gorgeous faces
• I'm happy but you don't like me
• I'm poor, but I'm happy
• That man has writer's block but I don't know if I'm him right now
• i'm flying from a fire
• Don't blame me, I'm from Massachusetts
• All I Know About Science I Learned From Michael Crichton
• I'm not talking about
• All I ever needed to know about unit conversion, I learned from drugs
• How to tell when a journalist has no idea what they're talking about
• Common misconception about bisexuals
• Things I've learned about vendors from working for a dealership
• You can learn a lot about someone from the way they die
• The further I get from the things that I care about, the less I care about how much further away I get
• Most pernicious misconception about evolution
• Poem about unseen aliens
• Fuck you I'm going to write poetry about your city
• Most of what I know about social inequality
• everything I need to know about life I learned from juggling
• Your radical ideas about taking candy from thefez have already occurred to others
• A quote about Russia from the Classic World Of Darkness wiki
• In this moment I'm focused on my own emotions. I don't care about how you feel. I can't.
• What can we expect from the aliens?
• Alien from L.A.
• most people don't know what they're talking about anyway
• I'm about to create a new node!
• The Most Expensively-Catered Bar Mitzvah Spread Wins
• tiny alien ideas sprout in his brain, like baby incisors erupting from his testicles
• Searching E2 from a Windows MSIE address bar
• in a world where the bar keeps seeming to be lower, where stupidity has got a foothold, there is room for excellence and uncompromising vision
• Searching E2 from a Konqueror location bar
• The 10 most normal things about 'Lard Enemas'
• Across the street from the karaoke bar
• When the aliens attack my workplace, I'm going to be so damn READY
• Everything is about a week away from paying off
• Advice the KJV Bible has to give about Everything
• F1r3br4nd and the Night Shift from Hell: VI
• I'm From New Jersey
• Happy Birthday From Planet Motherfucker
• Your success in life has been predetermined from birth
• From now on, any ordinary knowledge is no longer going to satisfy you, I'm afraid
• A list of things kids should and should not have from a woman who has no kids
• His memory perishes from the earth, and he has no name in the street.
• i'm a million different people from one day to the next
• Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying
• I'm not an American. I'm from New Orleans, bitch.
• Eternity in an Hour: Some notes from relationships
• The Wheel of Time has collapsed under the weight of its own bloated corpse
• This Hour Has 22 Minutes
• The most comfortable position to assume after one has been kicked in the junk
• Of course I'm made of corn, I'm from North America
• Just because I say Happy Hanukkah doesn't mean I'm Jewish
• I'm passionate about my plant life
• Happy Hour
• Someone has writer's block but I don't know if I'm him right now
• I'm cold, but I'm happy
• The Girl from Ipanema
• i enjoy myself most when i'm all alone
• I hope they kill me while I'm standing here, so I can die happy.
• The Most Happy Fella
• The most difficult decision President Bush has ever had to make
• Happy Birthday From Planet MotherSuperior
• Happy Labor Day from Insomnia Boy
• I'm really sorry about that!!!
• The things I'm most ashamed of
• When I'm wearing a bonnet and sipping pretend tea with Miss Ponykins and Zippy the Ugly Zebra, that's when I feel the most like a man
• I'm the most off-beat genius you ever knew; I'm so iconoclastic I'm clastic
• Wandering about with keys dangling from an oversized shoelace around your neck
• Murder at 1600
• The Golden Sayings of Epictetus, 160
• Ultra 160 SCSI
• Atari 400/800
• Child of the 80s
• Link 80
• 800
• Psalm 80
• 800 Club
• Moby Dick - Chapter 80
• The Golden Sayings of Epictetus, 80
• Sequential Circuits Model 800 Sequencer
• Cyberdyne Systems Series 800 Model 101 Version 2.4
• TWA Flight 800
• Sun 3/80
• 800 meter run
• That '80s Show
• Dewey Decimal System: 800
• Tahiti 80
• Catullus 80
• 80 If We're Lucky
• 80s Cartoons
• JLA #80
• International Harvester Scout 80
• Breaking 80
• Joan of Arc on the 8:00 D5
• Anatomy of a relationship, as interpreted by 80s music hits
• Sun Ultra 80
• Daleks and stairs
• What is this crap about trick-or-treating on Saturday?
• Feeling bad about a good deed
• The good thing about using a horribly outdated file system
• about nobody (superdoc)
• Tell me a story about trains
• What I learned about myself this year, 1999
• Why I am neurotic about love
• Haiku about kleenices
• 10 Things I Hate About You
• The Truth About Cats and Dogs
• Nodes about measurement
• about an Alice
• precision vs. accuracy
• More Songs About Buildings and Food
• LPPR: Illegal Speech About Drugs
• You are the kind of girl my mother warned me about
• Doctors know nothing about drugs
• tonight the cat decided to get in my bed which he doesn't usually do
• Stories about the injury of male genitalia

If you Log in you could create a "I'm the second-shift bartender. I tend the bar from about 8:00 to 16:00. My shift has happy hour, and usually the most alien customers." node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.