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my memories of this dream are kinda hazy, sorry
I was some kind of monk, I had some kind of device which could be used for some highly technologically advanced purpose.
The device was small, about the size of a hand, and it had what looked like a white straw sticking out of the end of it, which corroded slightly every time the device was used.
I was sent forward a long way into the future, and a long way in space, but by the time that this happened, people on my journeys had already used the device and it had stopped working, there was nothing left of the straw, so it was useless, but the people who kidnapped me in order to obtain the device, sending me into the future and to their ship (which was, in fact, the Death Star;), didn't know that.
Then I met up with someone who I just knew was Darth Vader's son (it wasn't skywalker), he looked a bit like some kind of monk too, but he was not really on the dark side. He tried to take the device away from me, and I proceeded to kick the crap out of him with my mad ninja skills like the scene in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, where they run up the walls.. I was running up walls.
So, that convinced him to leave me alone, and he was then fairly friendly towards me and I said that some kind of arrangement could be worked out between me and the Empire to secure the device for them, so he said that we would go upstairs and meet vader and the emperor.
I was pretty shit-scared of meeting the emperor.
And that was that. I have weird dreams.
this is nothing compared to the dream I had after playing Zelda 64 for 33 hours

Calmly I decide that I need to remove my own head. Calmly, I grasp myself around the neck and lift my head off my shoulders. I hold it in my hands and study it, the skin discolored, rotting and peeling, the hair wispy long, white and easily falling out.

I realize that it makes no sense for me to look at my head, in which sit my eyes, while holding my head in my hands. At this same moment, I also notice that I am standing before a mirror.

Looking in the mirror, I see that I still have a head. This is unsettling but not frightening. My skin is sickly pale with a strong green hue, my eyes sunken in large red circles. At first, I believe myself to be dead, but soon realize that I am not dead yet. This is not frightening. This is not a nightmare. I dream often, but I don't have nightmares.

I was in a crowded room inside a hotel. I was sitting down on a bench and just watching th people pass by. There was a family of four that caught my attention first. The mother was dropping the bags as she was walking in with her husband and two younger daughters. Her daughters were crying and wearing pink dresses. I went to go help the woman, her back to me. "Let me help with that mam." I called out. She turned around and the room stopped. I was staring at myself as I would look like (or so I think) when I am older. "No I'll be fine by myself," she said sternly and walked away.

I just stood there watching her leave.

I got up at 7:00 this morning to write these dreams down. There were more, but you know how dreams seem to vanish from memory without warning...
#1: My sister gets arrested
Me, my sister Andrea and my best friend Ryan were looking for a place to eat. We went to one Italian restaurant and were waiting in line, then suddenly Ryan produces this big bag of weed and says, "Hey Andrea, go put this in the truck. Just put it through the window." Andrea was a little weird about it, but she went and did it. While we were waiting in line, we got mad at some of the other people in line and decided to leave. So we went to a Mexican restaurant, and the same thing happened. Ryan had forgotten to leave the weed in the truck and asked my sister to deposit it, please. We waited for a table. She was gone a long time though so I looked out the window and there are 3 police cars and cops trying to arrest her, but she would have none of it. "Shit, she got busted!" I exclaimed and we all ran outside, where Andrea was vehemently trying to keep from getting handcuffs put on. The cops are getting tired of it all and we figured we had best get her to cooperate. So we showed her some pretty, brightly colored handcuffs and she put those on and we took her (instead of the police) to the courthouse where we said that the weed really wasn't hers and Ryan produced a receipt. the judge told us to just go away and no one got in trouble and Ryan got to keep the bag.

Don't you just love dreams with happy endings?

#2. My mom acts weird while shopping.
I was at a Ross-type budget clothing store with my mom, my sister Andrea, and her roommate Jamie. We had put a lot of things in the cart, but my mom didn't have any money and wanted to use my credit card. "I don't think they are going to let you do this," I said but she insisted. So we filled up the cart with clothes and my mom found this shiny blue shirt in a bin marked for clothing donations.
"I am going to buy this," she said.
"But it's not for sale" I protested.
"We are at a clothing store, this is clothing, so I am going to buy this." And she put it on a hanger and into the cart. We went to the checkout where the clerk is telling a handicapped lady she can't use a credit card unless it's hers, but we get in another line. I don't want to see what happens so I walk down another aisle and pretend to be very interested in the sodas. She finished checking out and we left. They wouldn't let her take the shiny blue shirt though and she was mad at how rude the clerk was about it. Andrea and Jamie went to another store in the shopping center and my mom and me got in the maroon Mercury, but it wouldn't start. My mom got really mad and told me that she couldn't trust my dad to fix anything. I reminded her that he died five years ago.

#3. My first observational dream
This was the first time that I was never actually a character in a dream, rather, I was just observing someone else's actions. There were two guys that wanted to jam together, I will call them the house owner and the blue shirt guy to tell them apart. The blue shirt guy wanted some money to buy drugs. His friend gave him some money and the guy went out and bought some weed. They smoked a little and the guy who owned the house wanted to play but the blue shirt guy (a blue shirt kind of like that funky textured one my friend Don wears, that makes you want to look it like a 3-D stereogram or just go up and pet it for awhile) "wasn't ready," so the house owner rolled his eyes and told him to do what he had to in order to get ready. So the blue shirt guy left and then my dream went through a bunch of scenes where he went out and bought acid off a bum in a park, then took a bunch of vicodin, then went back to the house. When the house owner walked into the practice room with a soda, his fucked up friend was trying to snort cocaine off of a fork. The guy that owned the place was pretty pissed and said, "So you want to play now"? The blue shirt guy replied, "Now there is only one song," and tried to knock his friend over with his index finger. The guy that owned the house got very mad and kicked him out, saying "So how much valium did you take?" To which the blue shirt guy replied, "vicodin man, there's a difference. vicodin. it rules, baby," and left the house, started walking down the street. It looked very bleak outside but then the point of view of the dream switched to what HE saw, in which he was walking through a blurry baseball field, where everything was very green, very twisted.

Outtakes
Also in the course of the night's dream activity, but I cannot remember the whole story line, my brother got fired from Eckerd because he had said "SOMEONE SET UP US THE BOMB...ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US" and the management took it as a bomb threat. There was also a part of a dream where I was six years old attending a Baptist kindergarten. And one where I could fly but my pants kept falling off if I did.


My subconscious is totally insane. You can't just make this shit up.

In the two hours of sleep I got, I dreamed I was watching a Peanuts cartoon, and the first thing I saw was Snoopy playing a mouth harp. It went like this:

"Doing doing doing-doing-doing da-da-doing-doing-doing doing-doing-doing"

The next thing I saw was Linus trying to make the same sound, using bubble gum. Lucy sat next to him and watched. It sounded like this:

"Buh b-b-BAH BAH-BAH-BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH B-B-BA-VA-BA-BABBABABABABABABABBBBAAABABABAB!!!"

I woke up ROTFLMAO, and my wife nearly punched me in the face.

Bags in trees
That no longer sag from leaves
instead burst with the birth
of new growths girth
and reach for the sky with hopes of never leaving earth.

I'm in a forrest, on the side of a mountain, I remember very little about the details of the forrest, other than the view as I look out over the hills, I see a beautiful valley.
It seems to be autumn, just after all the leaves have fallen, maybe it's even winter.
I look around me and see many people that I know, most notably, my ex-girlfriend, what bothers me is that she is with her currently new boyfriend, who scowls at me all the time (in the dream, not in real life).

I really start feeling bad about being scowled at, so I start walking away from the group of people in the woods, and suddenly, the forrest begins to thin out, and turn into a grassy plain type of region.

Winter wills it's own demise
as spring and summer induct new births to the hive
and the struggle to stay alive
is eased of it's tension
and thus comes the time to strive for sweet ascension.

We had to save the world, Rei, Asuka and myself. Except that our flying house was suddenly attacked by an evil force while we were down at the pub that only exists in my dreams, and everyone in it drowned in small hollow plastic balls, (such as are found in a ball pool). Luckily I, Rei, Asuka and everyone I know in real life were able to escape this monstrous fate and prepare for the end of the world.

For some reason, the invading aliens had booked Ferry Corsten to play sublime music as accompaniment to the entire human race being obliterated; I bought hotdogs and settled down to enjoy the music.

Meanwhile, I inexplicably released Asuka from her coma by saying that Rei was better than her at everything; somehow she single-handedly managed to make it to her EVA and activate it. Seeing this from the venue, Rei and I finished our hot dogs and saké and rushed back to our ball-filled house/base and also activated our EVAs. The dream ended then with "to be continued" at the bottom of my sensorium and really cool theme music. I felt cheated.

Wow. I haven't slept this long/well in weeks. Thirteen hours! I have actually dreamed as well - something I have not done since stumbling upon E2.

me

My dream last night was like an out-of-body experience. I wonder if that was what it was. It was about the end of the world. I have this crazy feeling that it's coming any day now.

him

Wow. I would like to hear all about it.

me

God was a late middle aged man in a velour sweat suit. The kind with contrast color piping. He had on big orange glasses, like the kind that tint when you go indoors. Jesus was a young nurse in a tight white orderly outfit with a clipboard.

him

uhg.

me

At least I think it was Jesus.

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